I got to cancel scarlett johannsen, the kardashians, and kanye. i’m pretty happy.

uh, what

just goes to show how people get the chicken at subway because i’m pretty sure this has been this way for north of a decade.

I mean, i’m sure jk’s got them taking magical, disappearing craps every 20 minutes.

Ew. Tencent.

some of us just fetishize using their skin to make leather jackets for the homeless.

don’t give biden, buttgieg or bloomberg the nom

may i ask why?

yeesh.

what are they complaining about. they have their statue, they have their shitty practices. 

shut the fuck up pete buttigieg. drop out of the race, go back to whatever shit covered rock you crawled from under so i can forget about your tired ass already.

quick, if we change all the locks he can’t get back in

isn’t henry thomas a drunk?

that seems like a massive oversight to include future releases.

betsy devos. unworthy of even proper capitalization.

i don’t know how white castle is still a thing

It’s hard to not know scarlett johansson is an idiot these days. 

I mean, it’s bill cosby

Fuck you t.i. . Let’s give you an invasive rectal exam to see if you’re regular every six months.