“I tried to march in the St. Patrick’s day parade, but... anyway...”

I unknowingly took a boy’s virginity in New Orleans on St. Patrick’s Day weekend, then proceeded to have the sluttiest weekend of my life (in a healthy/#reclaimingtheword way).

On a personal level, the modern waxed chest trend kind of weirds me out and I am perfectly fine with my men being hairy. But on a societal level, GOOD, FUCK YOU ALL, I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO SHAVE MY FUCKING LEGS TO BE CONSIDERED ATTRACTIVE, YOU CAN ALL SUFFER ANNOYING HAIR REMOVAL FOR DUBIOUS AESTHETIC REASONS TOO.

Yeah if we’re going to pick a Meghan Trainor song to play in hell it’s definitely Dear Future Husband. There’s no contest.

I believe her name (aside from “Mother”), is “Ofmike”.

John and Cindy McCain voted for Hillary. Don’t forget.

What would that speech have been if given by Obama, a D? Hell, that probably would have been one of W’s worst speeches. We’re in a dark place as a nation when people are falling over themselves to praise the 70 year old adult who got elected as president because he managed to go an hour without sounding like a…

They are just following our actual president’s suffragette style

After reading tweets from Katy Tur, Van Jones, Zeke Miller, Chris Cilliza and hearing about Chris Matthews all lauding him for sounding presidential with a capital P, Vincente Fox’s tweets softened the blow of the impending rise in approval ratings.

A-wink, wink:

What makes this even better is that Karen Pence inadvertently joined in.

Real G’s move in silence like lasagna.

RIP ONIKA

A legit female rap beef of this stature makes me think gender equality is possible.

You know he’s totally cool shit to hang out with.

Find yourself someone who looks at you like Lin Manuel Miranda looks at everybody.

A sexual abuser who has no respect for women won the White House. Is it really that big of a stretch that one would win an Oscar. Not saying it’s right, but shouldn’t be unexpected at this point.

I know it’s petty but whatever: Christ is that fucker ugly.

Act now, discuss later as a technique meant to bring me (a Hillary voter) into the fold? IT’S A BOLD MOVE, COTTON, WE’LL SEE IF IT PAYS OFF.

Moana will make you sob.