this is why i paid extra for the 8+ and portrait mode

My very first accident was me rear-ending someone. It was my fault technically but the guy stopped short entering a rotary. I was like 19 and he got out of his car and spent like 10 minutes inspecting the rubber bumper on his jeep or whatever instead of pulling out of traffic. I had to ask him if we could pull out of…

I had Mexican street corn today for the first time ever and it was outstanding!

I had a wreck this week, I rear ended someone. I’ve never been at fault for a wreck before. I feel like such a dumbass. My car was basically unscathed. His had really minor damage and he started talking about how the bumper would need to be repainted and the frame might be bent. Neither of those things were true or…

Speaking of dogs, what’s your favorite thing your pet does?

If you think it’s either right or smart to use the police department as enforcers of your unwritten rules of social mores, you’re the fucking problem.

Sat behind Liam at a Rangers game a few years back. He and his kids were whisked off to the VIP area at each intermission (we were in the center ice rinkside box with waiter service), at the start of 3rd period he came back early and alone and these 2 young women asked him to take their picture with the ice in the back…

Having said that, I’ll never stop following her. It’s just too funny!

so he swapped his seat for one toward the back

Preemptively posting a giant FUCK YOU to anyone who criticizes this action.

Yeah I’m not sure it helps Hardwick’s case that the only women sticking up for him is his wife, whose mother is like the patron saint of Stockholm Syndrome.

I asked too...it won’t work...no one’s listening.........

Dear Meteor:

Michelle only went sleeveless because she thought conservatives would love a free gun show

“The First Lady turned to the children and in a sweet but somber tone began, ‘I truly understand your pain. Day after day, trapped. You don’t know who you can talk to or who around you actually cares. Even with all the fancy toys,’ as she gestured to some games and potato chips the children had scattered around their…

Yeah but Michelle Obama wore something SLEEVELESS once! Why aren’t you libturds angry about that thing?!?!?!

Jesus, how are you out of the greys?

Handmade tortillas... lovingly warmed between buttcheeks.

Fantastic writing. Excellent research. Thank you.

when people are talking that bad about you and ganging up on you, in a really gang-mentality. You go, ‘Alright, we get it. I heard you. You made me feel bad. So now what? Are you happy?