Never has this gif more perfectly captured my response upon reading an article. *shudder*

It's true. If some unfortunate woman had her vagina sewn shut by some nutjob, I doubt the Jez community would find the humor in it.

Wow. Just wow. These comments. These fucking comments. I can't believe how fucked up most of you are. I didn't think my opinion of the Jezebel community could get much worse, but you guys have really outdone yourselves here.

Question of the day, followed by my sincere hope, that she doesn't make bail.

Probably because nobody's tried it yet. Or, nobody who's done it has then gone online to talk about it with any kind of coverage, anyway.

Thank you for actually being a good person here.

Yeah, I don't really see the humor in this situation. Just horror and fucked-up-ness.

Why was she allowed to visit her victim? Like.. what is up with that?

I find it baffling that some folks treat stories of male genital mutilation with a humorous touch. I imagine they would not be quite so lighthearted had a dude taken a knife to his wife's vagina.

Pretty much following the boom-and-bust trends of the mobile gaming market right now.

I hope to some day launch an app that disappoints so miserably as to make $1.6 million in the first five days. I don't know how I'll ever wash the stench of failure off myself after something like that.

Amen about the boyfriend! Mine is my husband now and I avoid playing the game because I know as soon as I open it he's going to call and say he misses me and wants to hang out. No thanks.

OMG. I'm at level 26 because my job is boring and I might as well play a dumb game on my phone. But seriously, if I have to go on one more 24hr date with my "husband" I will kill my character off.

Lindsay Lohan had a game??

Stealing this joke forever and ever.

Um, isn't Tyler Perry going to write this sequel? "Girl, I thought you were gone."

Right? I'm thinking about my SO, and there's literally nothing he could do that would make me think he's not sexy anymore. I mean besides murder or something.

What I want to know is- WHERE ARE ALL THE PENISES??! Hollywood sex is often a woman stripping naked while standing in front of the man, and the man managing to keep his pants on through the whole thing. That could not be further from most people's reality.