When I was a young alternative person, it was shameful to like Britney. I’m glad I can love her with abandon now.

How does any headline containing the name Peta Murgatroyd NOT include the phrase “Heavens to Murgatroyd!”

I’m so sorry for this, but: Comprises! Comprises! Not “comprised of.” Something is composed of stuff, and stuff comprises something.

Have a wonderful time ... haven’t been to Dollywood in a long time, so I don’t know what it’s like these days. But if you’re also going to Nashville, Little Big Town is doing a year’s residency at the Ryman. They’d definitely be worth seeing.

No joke, I asked out my now husband (the only guy in my adult life I’ve ever hit on!) by telling him he looked liked Ewan McGregor.

No no no, I meant he looks like Ewan McGregor just a little bit younger. I had totally forgotten Ewan actually had a brother. Whoops. Although not a bad looking guy, either.

Parton is beloved in East Tennessee cause she made good and came back for her people. Everyone loves her, even my mamaw that watches nothing but Fox news.

“I’m not donating to that scam. Those losers should’ve bought fire extinguishers instead of iPhones.” -Jason Chaffetz / Paul Ryan / fuck it, All Republicans

I can do pretty good Irish accent so I think I may have to borrow this from you even though I neither look Irish or handsome.

I married my husband because he looks like Ewan McGregor’s younger brother. I even get him to talk to me in a Scottish accent when I can’t reach orgasm.

I feel violated after seeing this.

Since we’re on the topic of not understanding how certain items become trends, I give you this atrocity, Gucci’s take on the sock boot (which is a ridiculous idea in and of itself):

Preach. I’m not sitting down and having my waistband hit my (rather small) tits EVER AGAIN!

That’s a thing? End times I guess.

...and how did we get suckered into having mom jeans again? HOW?! Has history taught us nothing?

I see.

Lil Harry with Earl Spencer and Prince Charles.

I don’t think Harry looks like Hewitt that much. Except in how all English ginger men look similar, generally. He looks like a perfect mixture of Diana’s brother and Prince Charles.

“I offer intellectual stimulation, my looks don’t matter.”