Online dating is worth it in the same sense that eating at restaurants is worth it: it's not the only way to go about it, and if that's the only thing you do, you're missing out on different and equally valuable experiences. To complete the analogy, the best meal I've ever had was at a restaurant, and I met the love…

Like a jump kick to the tear ducts, without fail.

I... I think I love you.

Pig Destroyer put out an excellent record in Prowler In The Yard, and then spent years pissing the rest of their ideas down their collective legs.

I'm not sure who disappoints me more: the mental toddlers whose literally zero value lives are only enriched by attempting to inflict psychic harm upon others, or the website overlords who cry impotence when it comes to policing such idiocy all in the name of some spineless appeal to "anonymous sources."

I'll admit that I was one of the (let's be charitable and say) approximately nine people in the world that, when the increased Pink label items at Victoria's Secret became a thing, thought: "huh, that's a weird corporate co-branding partnership." And yeah, considering some of the…

Even though I have more in common with an oyster than I do with a CEO, I'm glad he's aired the universal dirty secret of work vs. family balance: it sucks for all people involved, but women's choices are given far greater scrutiny.

An apple that is the embodiment of all humanity's failings and rejection of common humanity, and an orange that is the Palestine-Israel conflict.

The conflation of "disseminating information" and "disseminating opinion" is troubling. Do I have to adequately cite and articulate my reasons for hating grapefruit? Do I really need to know about the taxonomy, botany, and history of the grapefruit mother-anus (note: I do not believe the lie about grapefruit trees;…

"You're too kind."

—Michael Gira

[attempts to touch this particular take]
[gets third degree burns]

That first hug and kiss on the head: pow, right in the ol' dad emotions. Not only is this young lady so incredibly sweet, her sadness over her baby brother growing up is precisely the heart-pangs that parents feel all the time. Babies get older so so suh-ho fast, and it is an absolute truism: no matter how many times…

I don't get awards shows. I get football. I don't get this move. Preseason football is to football what quinoa salad is to actual salad: a horrid, wretched, alike-in-name-alone abomination released upon an unsuspecting planet by evil creatures from beyond the moon. Which fourth-string linebacker will get an…

Honestly, the economic impact of meat "production" (which is the most amazing euphemism for what is done re: cows, pigs, chickens, turkeys, etc., in this and other countries) is probably the most sane and sensible argument in PETA's arsenal—and they've pissed it right down their own leg. Between the aforementioned…

Man, but like, weed this good would give a player a competitive advantage when like... he, like... he...
[stares off for several minutes]
...have you ever considered that phones are basically toilets for mouth sounds?

[looks at comments section]
[CTRL+F people that, in the past, have criticized cops for acting poorly toward avowed criminals because abuse of power is bad]
[CTRL+F people that, in this case, are focused on the guy being a dickhead rather than the censorious gate attendant]
[notices sad amount of overlap]

Good luck trying to get any information from customer service at Uverse. Their online support gave me so much runaround and time-wasting script-regurgitation, it ended up being an hour before I got a "no, that bundle isn't available for you—but actually it may be if you call somebody" nonsense answer.

I was left shaking after a half hour of explaining what a cell phone is/does to my grandmother; that the grandpa in question is so self-aware in his commitment to, and inevitable failures in, properly acknowledging his grandson's identity is heartwarming.

Not for a lack of trying or interest, but probably just Indecision over which band pun to make.

Caveat: I am no lawyer. That said, once you get into depiction of a given crime, the connection becomes far too strained for the distributor to be deemed an accessory if they themselves were not present, aware of the crime during its commission, or specifically aided the offending principal in the commission of said…