Makes me think of on Father of the Bride when the daughter is gifted a blender by her fiance for a wedding gift and she has a meltdown because she thinks it means he expects her to be the “little wife”

<<<< As a Baby.. Your parents Love, Feed, Shelter and Protect you… That’s about as GOOD as it gets. Life is Cold.

I was really hoping this story was about Emile indeed.

J’accuse, James Franco

She sounds just as politically vapid as the politically vapid people she’s writing about.

“Now your kids with your loud music, and your Dan Fogleberg, your Zima, hula hoops and pac-man video games, don’t you see? People today have attention spans that can only be measured in nanoseconds!”

I feel like they want to say, “I’m going to kick her ass” but that’s shades of domestic violence, so they sanitize it by saying they’ll spank her, which takes on a sexual connotation!

I always feel like I’m overshadowed by the Lauren B.s and the Beccas

Kim is the living embodiment of Quint’s monologue about sharks in “Jaws”

aaaaand now I’m singing “No, I don’t want no shrubs, a shrub is a guy who can’t get no love from me....”

ugh they’re just super tired from all of their fiercing, okay???

If that’s the case, they should hire Rachel Dolezal as a consultant.

When my best friend gets unwanted dick picks she uses an app to decorate them with jewels and bows and sparkles and sometimes faces on the head and then sends them back. And to me.

I mainly just wanted an excuse to say the word genitals. Which is a great word.

This woman is a true hero. I should celebrate by sending her pictures of my genitals, right?

All I know is Frenchie was SO ahead of her time with that pink hair. She was a roller derby pin-up girl waiting to happen.

Yes. Happened to me last week

Alas, it is a lonely life in the grays.

Give the smart phones back to the adults and the hockey sticks and jump rope back to the youths. Everybody is fucking up.

spanked their 14-year-old daughter with a hockey stick and a jump rope