You forgot about Bungie's attention to being a dick:

I lack words to describe just how horrifying this is.

"Nightmare fuel"?

Easy there. Jazz is still a very young genre. It frequently still relies on talking with its hands.

Hmm, I think it would be a great idea if they would divide the gameplay between these two factions. So Blue gets Demacia and purple gets Noxus. Of course there would need to be more balancing. Seriously now, how two different entities can have access to the same champions ? Are they like yu-gi-oh cards and you collect…

What they said. Also, it makes absolutely no sense since from gameplay perspective, there is no limit as to which character players can choose so while Demacia and Noxus are supposed to be competing against each other, in game one team could have characters fighting for each of those nations.

Ha, I can see it coming bundled with a wireless adapter akin to Pokemon Fire Red/Leaf Green except instead it's a wired 56k modem. And we'd love it. Because 90s :).

"I feel so irrelephant..."

Well that's why they're future cigarettes. They can also project a cloaking field around you, and do your taxes!

But are our future bodies immune to cigarettes?