Me either. I’ve considered being an Uber, but I can’t work up the enthusiasm required to clean my minivan. Also I hate other people.

Going out drinking is the only reason why I’ve used Uber.

Years ago, I worked at a casino roller coaster and Andrea Bocelli was in line. I was on que or something that day (I don’t remember exactly what, just that I was the first employee people saw) and his manager came up to me and nicely asked if he could skip the line. He had to catch a flight in an hour but has been in…

FUck I need to know who it was. I’m kinda hoping it was someone super obscure and not your typical “Oh my God, it’s them” celebrity. Like maybe the Uber driver was just really into NCIS or something.