No, probably confederate

Mrs. Michaels: Al, do you really have to work on New Year’s Eve? I wanted to go dancing.

#1 Mack’s Daughter.

It is impossible to not tear up during Yondu’s funeral. I’ve been choking up at Cat Stevens’s Father and Son for decades now. 

My list would include:

Tomlin would have tripped a player in his rush to tell us.

The league will be called Cool Tackle Entertainment.

That’s total nonsense.

“No way would people be stupid enough to vote an incestual, pedophiliac, sex offending idiot President of the United States!”

Huh. That’s really surprising. I didn’t even know Ann Coulter had a sister.

The only way the Eagles have a shot at a deep playoff run now is if they take drastic steps and bring aboard a player whose very presence might cause a huge distraction due to his off-the-field racial statements.

I just threw up on my fucking shoes. Do you see what we let happen, people? The philly fans are smiling. GREAT JOB everyone.

I’m preemptively rolling my eyes at the inane GM scare ads that will try to bash the F-150 Hybrid.

Yup, sure is.

By way of comparison, NBC only let one employee go today.

Zoom in on that photo and you’ll see all the brown ones are lying down flat like they’re dead or something.

Glad to see my favorite driver “anyone but Kyle Busch” win the Championship.

You gotta admit, being pregnant is a great alibi for throwing up constantly while making a Zack Snyder DC movie.

But, aren’t they, like, sandbags?

Softy McSoftface