“And the A.I. sends an Alien back in time to kill Ripley’s parents before she’s born. We’ll call it the ‘Alienator.’ Man this is such a cool idea.”

Wow! Five items from which to build the Code 45* today! Let’s get at ‘er.

Bruce will make a deal with Lord Satanus to take the marriage away to save Alfred’s life.

“If theres a little bit of Laurel in there,....im gonna stick my dick in it.”

Bless your sole for doing that, Stef!

And everyone in the industry is sitting here thinking, “yeah, no shit.”

It’s not the coaching staff’s fault that the crowd noise is so intense.

This is like the time me and some buddies were driving down to Buffalo to see a Sabres game. We all met up at my buddy Aidan’s house and we were about to get in the car and, with it clearly in sight, I called Shotgun. Clear rules, right?

When addressing Trump, FUCK YOU seems like most appropriate response

Nope, too many books also. I went to the library, it was like a whole building just full of books I’ll never read. What’s even the point?

Sir, this is a Wendy’s drive-thru.

I want him standing atop a pile of ashes and skulls, clad only in a loincloth woven from his unworthy foe’s toupee.

Oh, my goodness, the poor old man must be exhausted! Getting up early to talk shit about Rand Paul, take a couple puffs on “Big” Luther Strange’s dick, twist some GOP Senators’ tails, and then plug the unrepentant band of pussy grabbers at Fox News and that steaming piece of fecal theatre of the absurd known as Fox &…

It is the 21st century, I eagerly await the advent of active duct tape.

Whhaaa???? Flat black over something like this!? Poppycock I say! If gaudy isn’t your thing, maybe something more straight forward. I think this 787 is heroic in the blue and white:

We are all General Kelly.

Why is Paul Bettany wearing glasses in that picture? Vision problems?

‘Listen, I know you guys have plans for him and, you know, that’s all cool, but you’ve got to give us this one because we can’t go to Lian Yu and not see Slade Wilson,’ and as part of those conversations we also were like ‘and he’ll also need to be in the season premiere of season six because that ties into, you know,…

Cuss all you want in the body of the article, but for the love of God can you stop dropping F bombs in the title of articles, particularly for something that everyone wants to read like The Morning Shift? You are going to get banned by our IT people, and then I’m going to have to work,