Malcolm In A Muddle

It will take a real triumph of the will to determine the best course of action.

åwesome gåme 

They don’t seem to have any sense of porpoise out there.

I’m looking for the proper exclamation, but all I can think to say is “Jesus!” of Nazareth’s goal. 

Surely they can ignore the 10 pm curfew if old people are MAKING the noise?

If Donovan seriously hopes to come away with that ball, he may as well try and catch the wind.

Floss before brush if you live with another human being. Flossing can unleash a bad smell of rotten food that toothpaste washes away. Duh.

Just wait until General Tso hears about this.

Heinz should have claimed that this guy had won their “Magic Bean” sweepstakes, given him one hundred thousand pounds and enjoyed the free publicity. 

That thing was hollering like it fell into a deep-fryer.

At least he didn’t crap on the craps table.

It was a real fat-and-mouse game.

One brother was Drazen, and one brother was brazen.

You didn’t like whipped cream? Inconceivable.

There’s something depressing about the way many people marvel at an act of the most basic human decency. Sportsmanship seems to bewilder the average fan. Get off my lawn.

The answer is curling.

No gauff!

They seem nice.

Plans are now underway for a diving pool at the Vatican.