This is a very cynical take on the natural-and-artificial-flavorings industry, and a sad commentary on our times. I hope Mr. and Mrs. Wegman aren’t reading this comments section! They’ve been through enough.

Just the fact that there’s this much to say on the subject proves the multiverse is real.

Joan isn’t here to make friends, nice, or sense.

(a) pausing to be amazed that anyone knows these things, or, more specifically, that someone who knew this thing appeared just 30 minutes after I posted.

How does this relate to the SweeTango apple that’s been advertising on some of my podcasts lately? Is it better? Worse? Is it the same apple with a different brand name, like a Chevy Tahoe/GMC Yukon? Or are these just two of a fleet of new apple-forms? Are new apples coming out every year and this is just the first…

Good.

So how adult-themes is it compared to, say, Bloodborne? Asking for a friend who’s the possibly irresponsible (possibly... cool?) parent of a 12-year-old who loves Bloodborne.

Exactly this.

I dunno. I think that lower-case ‘r’ with the little topknot is asking for it...

Awesome. Thanks. The irony and the tragedy is that, regardless of all those convolutions, this soda tastes exclusively like sugar mixed with water.

I cannot chicken-for-breakfast. Except for eggs (pre-natal chickens).

Melted butter for oil.

I feel like you’re still just trying to channel the lingering adrenaline from this peak moment, which bad timing has consigned to undeserved semi-obscurity.

It IS absurd, but I also assume there must be some legal reason they say it twice in slightly different ways. Like maybe “Naturally Flavored” refers specifically to the flavor referenced in the name of the drink (Key Lime) bu then they’re also required to specify that the other flavors are also chemically…

It’s “Flavored.” Or are you just busting their font-balls?

What can this* possibly mean:

No complaints. When I go for a Big Mac I know what I’m getting. Credit to the usual suspects that are a cut above: In-N-Out, Steak ‘n Shake,* Shake Shack etc. Not only better food - to my taste - but better looking.

Looks worse than any professionally fluffed fast-food burger I’ve ever seen in an ad. Looks about the same as every fast-food burger I’ve actually eaten.

Always a strange moment when someone drops a clear, informed, serious personal insight onto this pile of easy opinionizing. Sorry you had that in your life. Glad you got out.

Playing against a mill deck is, above all, boring. When someone starts milling, I like to forfeit. Which mill-ers hate, because it denies them the pleasure of watching me flail. Which is beautifully ironic. I came to play a fun strategy game. Miller came to short-circuit the shared fun in favor of a legal-but-joyless…