I mean, honestly, I really want that dress. Just to start off, I love Her Universe’s clothes, but I also just love the style of it. Kind of retro a-line style that I just adore... also, it looks like it has pockets! POCKETS!

Captain Marvel jacket?
*Pulls out wallet*
Oh boy I can’t wait to-

Shhh! You want to get sued? ... It's clearly "Marvelous Captain," an entirely original character like American Captain and Thur.

God dammit! Why are otherwise smart men so fucking stupid and don’t know how to behave like fucking human beings the minute they see a woman? Is there not one goddamned man with the tiniest bit of fame, power, or money who can NOT be trash?

This is like a “Mandela Effect” moment for me. I could have sworn this guy was already outed as an inappropriate perv. I am a science nerd, but more physics than astronomy. I’m trying to figure out why I keep thinking these things were already public knowledge. I was talking shit about Cosby and Louie for years before…

Buddy, the word about Tyson has been out there for 4 years now.

I hope Justin Timberlake isn’t in pain but I also hope he never releases a song again

Why would I want to be with someone who has been with hundreds of women? I would be afraid that he wouldn’t even remember my name afterwards. If you’re going to fuck a star, make it a hard star to fuck, and make it memorable for everyone involved. Have some fucking pride in your work.

I would have no interest in John Mayer’s number, but to be fair I doubt he’d have any interest in giving it to me.

Would you use John Mayer’s number?

When Martha gets out her hot glue gun, stuff gets EMBLAZONED, while the rest of the plebeians just get BEDAZZLED.

Carol Channing

Pete Wentz, Wenthworth Miller, Rashida Jones and Meghan Markle are on conference call, line 1. 

He probably thought she was “thick” and she probably thought he was “different” from the other blackity blacks.

I’m pretty sure I saw Janelle Monae (on skateboard) and Tessa Thompson (ethereal girl) as well. 

Ahh, the “close the one profitable part of our business that had a good reputation.” Classic.

I had never touched foot in a J. Crew until I was getting married and someone suggested them for a wedding dress. $500 later I got the perfect one without any alterations. Never been in one since, but I am thankful for that one occasion.

I don’t understand the armholes in blazers.  If I buy a jacket that fits my body I literally can’t move my arms.  I am not particularly broad shouldered or muscular either.  

All the stars for you. I remember when cranberry jeans came in. All I wanted was a pair in a 16W. Could I find them? HELL NO. Now, five years after they were cool, I can get them, but of course not when they were a thing.

The prices made me faint. I’m sorry— HOW MUCH FOR A CARDIGAN?