We can’t bust heads like we used to, but we still have our ways. One trick is to tell ‘em stories that don’t go anywhere...like the time I took the ferry over to Shelbyville. I needed a new heel for my shoe. So, I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to…

Replying to ungray. Just don’t be a vulture in disguise ;-)

I doubt they have the self-awareness necessary. And even then, they’d just stick wads of video ad revenue cash in their ears and pretend they didn’t hear us.

Exquisitely done.

They could even sweeten the deal by creating a subsite akin to Observation Deck, et al where subscribers can post their own thoughts, creative musings, and discoveries.

I’m not a regular Deadspin visitor (though I’ve always supported from afar until now), but io9, Jezebel, and The Root are my daily mainstays and I’d fight for them and the whole Giz family until my last breath. There are so few “fun” journalism sites left, especially ones that are so encouraging of their readership.…

“What do you mean ‘false advertising’?! This thirty-year-old hipster’s name is Bill Murray! Just look at his license!”

I’m 100 percent in support of the entire Giz family resigning and creating their own independent publication free from Great Hill’s bullshit, and would do everything I could to help out. And a paywall would totally be worth it if it keeps everyone safe from vulture capitalists.

Of course, now that P.F. Chang’s will be almost impossible to get into...

It’s like his entire life has become one long piece of performance art, and I love it.

At least Young Zoe is still alive, so it’s not a complete gut punch...still, :-(

Joke’s on you; to me, that’s a compliment :-D

You can never have too many smoking hot LGBTQ pairings. Plus, you could have the four of them be a quad!

I’m pretty pro-Betty/Jughead, but I’d support Betty/Veronica in a heartbeat. Of course, if Riverdale were real, they’d all be in a penta with Reggie anyway.

Maybe they thought it was a papier-mâché boulder they could just squish?

Demons don’t compress.

At least Reggie and Veronica are together in real life (their portrayers, anyway), so there’s that.

Once you go duck, life doesn’t suck!