I know this is an unpopular opinion, but I feel like the most humane thing to do would have been to put this cat down.

Once my bangs get past a certain length, they just turn into greasy strands. I am going to have to try this dry shampoo business so my hairdresser can stop screaming at me for wanting my bangs so short and I can get a bang trim between dye jobs like a normal person.

This is not the direction in which equality should be going.

Maybe if we made a semantic shift and called mass shooting deaths “post-term non-elective abortions” or something...and made graphic videos of the aftermath and then blamed it on liberals somehow?

So were six people travelling together and decided to wrap all their favors in the same newspaper, or did one person get such a kick out of the favors, they took six?

I roasted a whole chicken for the first time in my entire life. I signed up for an organic veggie delivery co-op at the office, so I’ve been over-doing it with the vegetarian meals and really, really craving flesh. While eating a delicata squash half stuffed with quinoa, onion, red pepper, walnuts, and goat cheese and…

When I was in high school my boyfriend’s mom used to tell me that if I kept eating macaroni, eventually that’s how my thighs would end up looking. Alas, she was correct. So all noodles are thigh noodles, apparently.

Beautifully written but all this article needed to say is: Fall = cinnamon brooms and that makes it the worst. The end.

It’s one of those things that’s all about context. If a kid with southern parents calls me Miss Agouti, I’m perfectly happy because I know that’s how they were taught. If another kid calls me Mrs. Avenger, so be it. I might correct them to say “Ms.” It’s when adults call me “Mrs. Avenger” that I get annoyed, because I…

I wouldn’t want to feed some asshole who would post that meme either.

Every time I see that meme “Men Cooking: Because this generation of women don’t know how” I make sure to respond “Men Cooking: Because they are human and need nourishment”

Except that’s exactly how you make a bright young person susceptible to being recruited by terrorists, so that’s counterproductive on their part.

Is that her son?

He could also offer to go to rehab for Josh Duggar while he’s at it.

I’m getting this kind of vibe from the photo-op.

Huckabee or her husband wearing overalls in a place other than a field?

Holy shit! Her mom held the office forever AND her son works there?

I also hope she also has to pay back her salary for the time she wasn’t doing her fucking job.

Your pig is an agouti, therefore, if it ever needs avenging, I will be glad to do it.