Look, if he were a better passer, runner, play-caller, and the rules changed, he would be a top-20 contender for greatest of all time.

This week in Footy Bantz with Fitz and Hunter, Liverpool became the first team this season to actually defeat Manchester City, a feat that Fitz’s beloved Man U had not been able to accomplish. That said, because this was Liverpool, there was no way they weren’t going to let a 4-1 lead stand, so they went ahead and…

It’s a case of moral Muphry’s Law.

Also known as Taco Bell’s patented “run for the border.”

United has that history. Mourinho, though? Not so much.

I will also add that the best thing about Man U is the delicious feeling of watching them fail.

It could also be that they based it off Iain De Caestecker’s Premier League team of choice.

I like where your head is at. I have a similar theory: Rose Quartz was actually a fusion of Pink Diamond and another gem. Given how the other Diamonds view fusion, it would be easier to accept that this new gem before them killed Pink than it would be to accept that this was their “sister.”

Yeah, that was the same vibe I got.

Also, more football banter between them. With Radcliffe gone, Fitz needs his footy bantz!

I’ve been saying for some time that really, none of Rory’s boyfriends have actually worked for her. When Jess and Rory were together initially, they were both immature teens that brought out the worst in one another. Of the two, only Jess seemed to really grow up. Meanwhile, both of Rory’s other exes are completely…

Oh, cool! Thanks! I too know what it’s like to have a last name that is difficult to pronounce based on the spelling alone, so I try to be sensitive on that sort of thing.

So I have to ask: how does she pronounce her last name? Is it “Kot-bee” or “coat-bee” or is the “b” silent?

I think it is safe to say that the first letter-writer was too close to his ex for his girlfriend’s comfort. The fact that he felt the need to hide his relationship with his ex (which seems from the letter to cordial but not romantic) means that his current relationship was never going to work.

Would it be wrong, though, to refer to chili as “an American dish originating from the state of Texas?” Similarly, I’d think of poutine as “a Canadian dish originating from the province of Quebec.” I mean, it’s not really my place to say what is or isn’t offensive (after all, the definition of “offensive” is simply…

I mean, it’s not like they *haven’t* been strongly marketing towards that segment for the past several years. Hell, when they added delivery through Door Dash, it made it even more convenient, as even the most couch-locked could order a bunch of high food from the convenience of a smartphone app.

I mean, it’s the reason I wake up at unseemly hours on a weekend, so I’ll accept it.

It still cracks me up that the only reason De Gea is still at United is a mysteriously broken fax machine.

The way that Fitz was ranting about goal-keeping errors makes me think that Agents of SHIELD takes place in an alternate world where Man U and Liverpool have swapped ‘keepers. In our reality, United’s goalkeeper, David De Gea, is a large part of why they are as successful as they are, while ‘Pool’s Simon Mignolet…

Meanwhile, from PSG’s perspective, this will be an early chance for them to live up to their lofty aspirations and budget.