Yeah, it never is. Thanks! At 35, it's not all that complicated to manage. I think.

Good for Emma. It's one of those things that make me think, "Yeah, I should go back and finish school..."

Wait...the green stuff isn't another Kardashian?

And why does his current wife/daughter/keychain look so much like a Kardashian? Why do ALL the women look related, for that matter? Am I just getting old?

I just realized that, for a newbie as myself, the shared Kardashian universe is as impenetrable and dense as it is to make sense of the X-Men or something equally geeky for a first timer!

That was great, and that's high praise, from me considering that I can't think of anyone I'd wish a fierier, more gruesome death than to the Lukewarm Chili Peppers.

Is there nothing that you can't find on the internet, I wonder? Ghost donuts? Pepper pencils?

Well, I can't remember most of my passwords, so even remembering what I post anywhere is a big effort. I stopped using twitter for ages because I forgot my password, and I couldn't reset it because I forgot the password to the email I registered it to. It's a struggle.

It doesn't take taking driving lessons for a 16 year old to scare the beejesus out of your parents. I never did learn, and I still managed to make them quake in their boots!

My two year old daughter can fall and remain asleep in the middle of a Disney concert-thing-event inside a sports arena packed with another 5,000 screaming kids. But sometimes a cough in the middle of the night can wake her up. Seriously, WTF?

I know! When we watched in the cinema, I thought "THAT'S the song I want to watch it again for!" But the problem is that, since, spoiler alert, Hanz turns out to be the bad guy, it sort of loses some of its gravitas, and it becomes a sign we were fooled.

By mistake or design or whatever, these kids find themselves being parents. They are not glamorizing the fact they are teen parents. What the yearbook is, in fact, celebrating, is that the incredible burden of parenthood hasn't overwhelmed these kids to a point where they failed to fulfill their responsabilities,…

As a man, I totallly thought: "Hey, I kinda look like that!" and felt better. So, everyone wins.

One of these days, one of those poor graphic artists is going to hide a CGI dong in between Ryan's CGI abs and it's going to ruin it for everyone, forcing them to go back to the gym.

But, um, couldn't internet darling Gosling just, you know, work out when he has a part coming up? Isn't that easier than CGI-abs?

You give them cake, of course. Confetti cake.

I'm afraid that my jeans are so grimy they might become sentient.

Until you were faced with an angry customer, I bet.

Now that I think of it, I've seen it happen too in Cancún bars, where they get quite a lot of American patrons.

Esa lima es con la que hacen la sopa de lima en Yucatán, verdad?