I was right there with you until the hypersexualized part. Can’t a woman sing about some self fuckin’ without being a hypersexperson? Let her live yo.

I’ve always thought that they are really one of those Cowell-X-Factor-UK experiments that have mostly worked out. One of their earlier singles is part of my favorite work-out jam. I always like to (need to?) listen to it several times in a row. It’s got that hook, ya know, that has me addicted.

You’re a goddamn champion for continuing.

This only happened to me once, I was pregnant at the time. When he came and filled my mouth, it triggered a really nasty gag reflex. Up came my last meal along with his contribution, all over both of us. He immediately picked me up and carried me to the bathroom and tried to take care of me. I was screaming to get the…

Was drunk once and barfed on my (now-ex) boyfriend’s dick. He took it surprisingly well.

when guys try to finger you like they are tenderizing a steak

I’ll never forget the ex-boyfriend who excitedly told me he’d seen an instructional video on the internet where someone had trained away their gag reflex and thought it could work for me. He then proceeded to show me a clip of a woman hooked up to a machine that operated thusly: the more she deep-throated a dildo, the…

This might have happened to me once. Maybe.

Right. That stuff stops being awesome or easy by 25. And frankly most of it is us pretending we want to spend all night at the club...because that’s what you do in your 20s.

Doggy is my spirit animal.

Nope. I did that a couple of years in my 20’s, and I think it just seems more fun in retrospect.

Yes on the sleeping anywhere uncomfortable. I’m the youngest in my family and not married, so I’ve always been relegated to the floor, sofa, or airmattress when we’re overcrowded during family gatherings. I put my foot down a couple of years ago. I’m too old for that shit. My brother was a total dick about it, but now…

No.

Even at work anymore, I get comments, I fire right back. Some guy told me to “cheer up, smile!’ the other day at work and I snapped back at him immediately with “do YOU always smile when you’re at work?’

I’m too old for sleeping anywhere uncomfortable. No, I will not stay out all night and then crash on your floor, I want to be in bed at a reasonable time, with a cup of tea and a book. I suffer a lot of muscle pain and if I have a bad night’s sleep, I am sore and I hate everything. I am too old for that.

I’m also too…

I was thinking about this - re the usual female feelings of fatness not fatness - and I realized that even when I actually was bone thin, ribs showing, I still thought I was obese. Now I am decidedly not super skinny anymore, actually do have fat, and I just don’t care because no matter what size I actually am, I am…

I had a coworker ask me to dance at a Christmas party once and I gave him my best April Ludgate and said “DOES IT LOOK LIKE I DANCE? NO. It looks like I sit at home and smoke pot and listen to records.”

He laughed and bought me a beer and we talked about music all night.

And WOW I just got really, really sad because I…

Giving a shit about my physical appearance.

Vegas is the worst! I tend to get sensory overload pretty easily, and I hate not having windows or being in dark rooms, so Vegas is basically hell for me.

I’m too old to put up with shitty male behavior. I’m sorry, I’ve just had it. The catcalling, the violence, the entitlement, the leaving the seat up, all of it. If you can’t behave like a decent human being, you can get the fuck out.