Its Murdaaaaaaaaaa

“And remember, Junior, if the teacher forgets to assign homework, make sure you point that out before your classmates clear out.”

Sweet Jeebus, could you imagine if the NFL encouraged fans to report infractions as they were happening on the field, and then those infractions would be enforced? Holy shitballs, that would be a cosmic clusterfuck. But...I kind of also want to see it.

“Well, I’m sorry if you just can’t handle a fan of sport making sure the rules are followed, good sir.”, the dickbag says, just before calling the HOA about those infernal children selling their damned lemonade down the street.

Rumor has it the cheerleaders were also part of a pyramid scheme.

egg noodles with ketchup

I love how “working-class” is a term to mean white and employed in manufacturing, repair services, energy production, agricultural production, or police and emergency services. God bless those people. They’re the salt of the earth.

Yes yes yes. These dumbasses thought Obamacare was something different from the ACA and now that they have learned it’s the same fucking thing, suddenly it’s “don’t take away my healthcare!” They were fine taking it away from the mythical lazy negroes and Mexicans, though, of course.

I would like to remind everyone that this is not censorship and that Playtonic as a private business has the right to express itself as they see fit. If they do not wish to include voice work by a controversial figure in their video game that is well within their right. Jon’s free speech was not violated in any way…

D.B. Pooper

Parachute, poorly faked death.

This is yet another reminder that having a child does not suddenly make you an expert on literally anything, and that the act of birth is something that literally billions upon billions of people around the world, both very smart and incredibly fucking dumb, have done throughout millenia.

They should have asked him for his SAG card in return.