They pushed the button, the light came on, they waited for the doors to open.

Thank goodness justice gravity is blind.

Phew!

How completely, amazingly unselfish and badass!

7 years. IRS can go back 7 years.

I brown the meat, onion, garlic in a skillet, season it, then dump it in a slow cooker with everything else. I do use Hatch (Amazon sells canned hot Hatches) chiles.

“Owned”

I don’t hate mayo, but I don’t like it straight. In tuna/chicken/potato salad, fine.

Makes you wonder about those stories about Brady polishing his . . . Kraft

But he also gets a $38 clothing allowance.

I thought butterscotch candies.  Same color, but a bit more sweetness in the final product.

Such an odd shot. It appears any horizon was kept out of the framing of the shot.

But you have to admit, when you have 5 rings, and your team has 79 years of Super Bowl experience, and the other team has 53 seconds because their waterboy stood on the sidelines for almost a full minute before security kicked him out, and you can still convince your players that they’re somehow the underdogs, that…

September 23, 2018 - Lions beat the Patriots, 26-10.

Can we make it official by substituting “watching a rerun of SB LIII” for “being hit by a bus” in all future Deadspin lists?

The Puppy Bowl was more captivating.

This isn’t even worthy of Yakety Sax

Me: Where would you like to go for dinner?

If they haven’t had sex, how does he know?

Comments sections are the worst