Like any good drunk, he waited till the day AFTER the Super Bowl to do this.

Tough break for the Lions, losing Suh for the entirety of the playoffs.

I'm waiting with decreasing patience for America to have its man-up moment, to stop acting like 310 million sniveling toddlers crying to mommy.

If a Seth Rogen movie kills America, then the country deserves its fate. Let's break it up and start fresh.

Vandy athletics managed to squash an article I was trying to right about some potential (though accidental) fraud on the track team.

Tidbits of information "Java is slow to change, so it's easier to keep up with". So why does it need to update on my computer seemingly everytime I turn it on?

I am sick of people saying "the wrong side of thirty." There is nothing wrong ...

Sounds more like you're an asshole than someone breached the rules of common decency.

Granted I don't know the daily struggles of a midget, but I imagine being associated with Manziel is one of the worst things that could happen to them.

Can't wait till they give that cord an extension.

The Bears just signed the cord to a 5 year contract worth 70 million dollars.

RIGHT? I am not even a cat person and I would be prepared for this type of reaction. The title of this piece should be "People Who Apparently Have No Idea How Cats Even Work Somehow Have Seventeen Cats And Manage To Lose One On A Trip Because They Are Cat-Not-Understanding Fuckwits."

Now the world needs a Bengal defender to injure himself like this, so the trifecta of Lions, Tigers, and Bears injuring themselves in stupid ways could be complete.

By request.

Delusional, really? Could a person suffering from delusions carefully shade in a huge, perfectly identical, "TMZ" logo on each page?

Eh, I'll wait until a Nissan dating sim is created

Ray Rice gets two weeks (initially).

Goddamn, man. Congrats on becoming a professional writer. Great work.