This XJ is looking kinda sad to lose to the Impreza

Yep, that's the correct translation

Google Translate my ass. The injured man was 65 years old.

It's Alexander Grigoryevich Lukashenko, the President of Belarus', saying that Crimea is a part of RF now, whether you like it or not (Crimea was integrated into the Russian Empire in 1783, and handed to the Ukrainian SSR in 1954 by Nikita Sergeyevich Khrushchev).

Yep, that's what I forgot to take into consideration while voting. I definitely couldn't bring myself to run a nice little car into the ground

Oh, shi....

There has been a lot of warmongering going on on Jalopnik lately, especially, in M. Ballaban's articles. It doesn't go well with Jalopnik's "Drive free or die" motto, the emphasis is rather made on the "die" part.

Henry Ford was not exactly a racist, he was an anti-Semite and he cooperated closely with Nazi Germany. A quote from Wikipedia: "In July 1938, before the outbreak of war, the German consul at Cleveland gave Ford, on his 75th birthday, the award of the Grand Cross of the German Eagle, the highest medal Nazi Germany…

Thank you for posting this great video. So, the USA basically supports the unlawful Neo-Nazi regime, while comparing Putin to Hitler (double standards in full swing). Just google Stepan Bandera (at 2:25 you can see the Maidan protesters waving his portrait), who was involved in the killings of Poles, Jews and Russians…

Yep, while traveling abroad, I'm ashamed of my compatriots once too often

He's just a little boy compared to Sergei Kabalov, a drunken jerk who assaulted a flight attendant, broke his fellow passenger's nose, and threatened to hijack the plane:

Oh, poor little Ballaban, crying in your momma's basement, frightened by cruel Soviets invading the shit outta the whole world. You're just a victim of anti-Russian propaganda carried out by biased media in the USA; your anti-Russian stance is obvious in your latest articles on this topic. Putin is not "making up…

Parallel-parking this abomination must be a breeze

Nope, shown here is the interior of an intermediate car in a newer subway train, which has been in production since 1976. Hell, I ride to work in these trains 5 days a week!

"Just one more thing, Dude...You have to use so many cuss words"

Sir, I beg to differ. While driving, I usually listen to "Rock FM" - 95.2FM in Moscow - classic rock music. I wish I had a mullet :)

It's a slightly modified JDM Toyota ist

There was also a nice E-HC33 Nissan Laurel at 2:49

JDM cars don't have proper 17-digit VINs, only "vehicle ID numbers" or "frame numbers"

Yeah, that's what I thought when I first saw the screenshot from surveillance camera video recording