Or my grandfather's "I'm not racist. I worked with two Jamaicans and they were perfectly nice." This is a word for word quote. My Grandfather hadn't worked in at least 20 years.

The level of detail in this is unnecessary news-wise and imo does not meet the "public interest" measure, but "cruel to the family" is not a reason to leave something out of a news story. As a junior reporter at a daily I once wrote an article about a baby who died when the mother rolled on it, based on the coroner's…

I couldn't remember her name the other day and called her the "racist butter lady" and everyone knew who I meant. (Context: "It's not that big a deal, even that racist butter lady has her own cruise.")

Ketchup is America's main source of vitamin C. So... there's that I guess.

A 26 year old man child I worked with could not cook and did not eat vegetables. He lived on frozen everything - pizza, chicken nuggets, tater tots. He basically lived like toddlers wish they could. When I asked how that happened he said "My mother always did the cooking. She never asked for help, I think we would…

This is unlikely to escape the greys, but I picked up my boyfriend by writing my phone number on his shirt. It was a"graffiti" party where everyone got a white t shirt and we all drew on each other's shirts. I was drunk, he was sober, we talked a lot throughout the night. I saw him heading down the stairs and said…

Rachel Dratch addresses this in her (highly recommended) memoir - she says if you saw her on the street you would think she was average looking but in Hollywood she can only be a troll. This is one reason I love watching UK shows. People are allowed to look real. TV land isn't this weird magical place where no one has…

Well a care home is a social service... so I'm pretty sure they're already on top of the local options.

FYI the go to group pizza is pepperoni, green peppers and mushrooms. Not usually anyone's favourite, but most likely to have the least number of people hate it. Except vegetarians. Ugh. Always messing things up for the rest of us.

I don't think Aruinshire was judging - just saying that it's a difficult decision and their mother sometimes wonders about making a different one. I imagine that no matter which decision you made you would wonder if it was the right one.

A family friend has a son who has Down's Syndrome and she is disabled now so he had to go into a care home and she's said that she loves him but if she had known early in her pregnancy then she would probably have aborted. I admire her for saying it, because I think even implying you would consider it will often get…

It's okay. She's actual 25. Sigh.

A guy I work with recently sent an email that only contained a picture from Brokeback Mountain with the subject line "Glory goal celebration" to a client instead of a colleague. We all laughed so hard. Especially because he didn't realize for about two days, when the colleague said he'd never seen the email.

I would take it as a compliment. I've been working for years to level up my bitchdom.

One of my biggest gripes with 50 Shades is that based on the trailers, Jamie Dornan is 200x hotter than Christian Grey. I didn't read the books, don't care about the movie, but if you're casting "Adonis" and you have found "Hottest Man on Netflix" you don't remove all his body hair. Seriously. You just don't.

When I worked at a newspaper the local government was talking about trying to get pandas for the zoo and when it fell through the headline was:

THIS IS AMAZING!!!

Clicked because I thought those were Jalapeño Cheetos. I'm not mad, I'm disappointed.

Mmmmno... Look at that smug smile. WTF is Grace so smug about? She shat herself way more recently than anyone I know.

Ice queens unite! My romance/nostalgia setting is broken. A drunk friend-with-benefits once told me I was an "ice queen on an island surrounded by barbed wire and a freezing ocean". I took it as a compliment.