I love everything about this... I think I might like John Oliver more than Jon Stewart now.. maybe still a tie...

Also, I JUST HAD to look up "Sonnet to a Clam", and now I'm dead of really terrible 19th century clam puns. Thanks, internet.

Please. Next Thursday I will be watching The Fall.

I liked this movie better when it was called American Psycho.

I just saw her in DC and her Taylor Dane story had me in tears. I am a straight woman who had the fleeting thought of leaving my husband and trying to make her fall in love with me. She's the best.

I want to meet her so badly, if only to say- "Excuse me, I'm sorry to bother you, but I just have to tell you: I love you(r voice)."

I saw Insane Masturbatory Rampage open for Slayer in '92.

Well, this guy really is probably having the worst day since yesterday.

"What are you gonna do tonight, Stef?"

Everyone I know who has ever met Jon Hamm (which, to be fair, is about 3 people) say he is the nicest dude. NOTE: THIS IS NOT AN INVITATION TO TELL ME ANECDOTAL EVIDENCE THAT HE IS NOT NICE, HE IS PERFECT, I REFUSE TO BELIEVE OTHERWISE

I put on my "don't rape me face" today and had ten men tell me to smile.

I do. Sometimes my thought process goes like this: 1. No way, 2. Well, I need to be more open, 3. Hey! he's interesting and I'm horny, 4. And he's sweet. 5. And smart. 6. He's not that bad, 7. He looks cute today, 8. He's actually kind of hot.

she smiled because she was happy he was able to escape. That's what I thought

And the scene where she has 200 strawberry shortcakes to make and finally finds strawberries, and starts individually picking them out of baskets and balancing them in her hands like "These are the strawberries I want?" GAH. I have made strawberry shortcakes for 50 and damn, that's already a lot of strawberry prep and…

I am watching the Gilmore Girls, too - about 10 episodes in. I may not be able to take it, though, because the kitchen scenes KILL me. It's like they did not even try to get advice from anyone who has ever worked in any kind of professional kitchen. Sookie acts like an idiot, buys food like an idiot, even CUTS like…

I'm only being this person because one of my parents is currently living with this type of cancer and it's grade 4, not stage 4.

Not to understate the general stupidity of the article, but I'm intrigued by this in particular:

All that gif needs is a subtitle of, "M'lady..."

Nothing makes me want to friendzone a guy more than a guy complaining about being friendzoned. Also, it's too bad a fedora isn't included in that list of things to buy