more of a list then a story.

That last one is truely frightening!

I don’t see anything in the Gap advertising that connects it to MLK day. I’m Canadian so we don’t have MLK day here but the Gap seems to have some sort of different promotion every other week... so is Gap really trying to encroach on MLK day or was it a coincidence that their promotion happens to fall on the same day?
I…

(sucks air in through clenched teeth) I love me some Kristen Wiig but that dress looks like a 70's polyester mess. Was it from the movie wardrobe? Christina doesn’t seem to be dressed in character.
The colour does nothing for her complexion.

"otherwise matters zero percent of the time"
False: It matters every time you can not reach the items on the high shelf and he assists you.

Up Front: I didnt bother to read the article. MyIMHO IT is not xmas that should be moved. its your silly american Thanksgiving that should be moved up a month. I know what your thinking: Stupid Canadian. But hear me out. If Thanksgiving was in October the weather would be better for travel to visit your families.…

Umm... hello? EVERYONE knows that once you use your birth canal you are never allowed to dress sexy again. duh!
J/K Tabloids are the trolls of the print world.

I'm not going to ditch basic grammar just to seem nice in a text.
On the other hand, I'm pleased to find out that my accurate use of punctuation has been conveying my bitchy attitude for me!

If you are talking about Picards in Ontario, you gotta try their Cookie Nuts. The Cinnamon ones are CRAZY TASTY.

I've LOVED Halloween above all other hollidays (including my birthday) for so long that my mom actually sends me Halloween greeting cards. This year i was Holly Golightly from Breakfast at Tiffany's and i nailed it!

Option C is still > option D (do nothing). Maybe im just one of the clever but your costume could be Tootles from Peter Pan... you'll just need to misplace your marbles in never never land by next halloween!

I cant tell you if you would be Fab or Flop but i can tell you that one hand would constantly be unavailable for normal use due to the fact that you are holding the thing like a floppy toddler.

Now thats a "dad joke" if I've ever heard one!

" It's like watching a puppy run up to greet an operating steam roller. It can't end well." Best Metaphor EVER!! I'll be using that whenever possible.

I could argue with you all day about this but i will be decent, as requested. It's clear to me that no matter what i intend to say that it will be distorted to match your preconceived image of me as an asshole. Please in the future allow others to have their own opinion and realize that calling a stranger an asshole…

Listen Honey, Just because you're wonderfully marvolous at communication with your $10 words doesnt make it ok for you to judge how people handle their business. The slow fade has been used by me and against me and it can be very effective. Have you ever heard of Schrodingers cat? Sometimes relationships are best left…

Slow fade is acceptable because healthy communication is a GD rarity. especially in the chronically single and looking for love through a digital format era we live in

First: I had to look up Bennidict whats-his-face to know who he was. Second: Still have no clue who he is. Third: He's hardly conventionally actractive let alone "sexiest movie star" Forth: the survey mechanism must have been malfunctioning because it is wrong.

Only pop starlets trying to make a stir

Faking pregnancy is just one of the grades on the Crazy Bitch spectrum. It's somewhere between "thinks making 300 sandwiches will get him to propose" and "smells their BF's dick when he gets home to ensure his faithfulness"