This is like the classy version of my drunk idea of making a soup each color of the rainbow.

You had me “dried cherries” :D

Woah, that’s beautiful!

Oooooh, I like the all green-idea!! I’ve never tried grapes in salad before!!

I know, I don’t understand why a loving God would give humans both bacon and a susceptibility to heart attacks :(

Goddammit, I want to eat that. What’s in your ginger dressing, unless it’s a secret? :)

The best defense is a good offense. Favorite salads, go!!!

I’m really looking forward to his next song, “Inseminated”

I promise to give you half my bling when I become a bazillionaire from shamelessly stealing that pure poetry you just wrote.

And “stimulated” just has to be the least sexy word ever. *barfing forever*

omg, you’ve sold me!!

OMG I’m now desperately disappointed I wasn’t in charge of entertaining a group of indecisive black Labs for a week!!! :D

I wish I was in Singapore- I’ve always wanted to go! But I’m in LA. We tried to go last night but the wait was too long, so it must be good!! I bet there’s a delicious place in NY, too. :)

I ended up having to pick, so I picked Singaporean, but we got there and they had a huge line!! So we ended up going out for fancy pizza and everyone was really happy. But that Singaporean place is definitely on my list to go back, it looked amaaaazing :)

OH MY GOD, YOU HAVE JUST CREATED MY NEW FAVORITE HOBBY

omg, I loved every single Lil Debbies product as a kid. I don’t understand how I’m not diabetic. now.

I haven’t lived in Lincoln, only visited for a week for a conference, but I liked it! The beer was good and it seemed outdoorsy/sporty. I’m sorry I don’t have anything more detailed than that.

OMG, I also know your frustration of being a planner/introvert traveling with someone who is neither. The worst moment was when I broke down and yelled at her for telling me to pick her up at the wrong train station, which left me figure out where she actually was and drive an hour to get there, because why would she…

I just ask straight out if they’ll put their fingers inside me while they’re already going down on me, and so far everyone I’ve tried it with seems to think it’s pretty hot

Um, if your calves WERE the same size as your thighs, that seems to be the body type skinny jeans are made for, so your friend is objectively incorrect in multiple ways.