I think I’m being radicalized.

As a new-ish dad, I want to frame this comment so I can look at it every day and remind myself to learn all the things and never turn into the kind of husband that this could be said of.

Your words really struck a chord with me. Having to use both mental and physical energy to complete boring but necessary tasks, and your partner sitting back jovially like ‘whats the big deal? Chill baaaby’, (I’m picturing Rick from Big Mouth for all those playing at home) staring at you from the couch like you’re a…

That resulted for me in the children not being fed, bathed, or taken to school. You can only leave it to someone who is willing to take some responsibility and stop pretending they are helpless and a victim. In my case, someone who could some how get through medical school but couldn’t pour a bowl of cereal for a 4…

Girl, same. Particularly this:

Same.  Now divorced. Kids don't want to see him, youngest says his Dad didn't speak to him for about 2 years, not through falling out, just indifference. 

I consider myself a hands- on dad and I know I don’t do half of this. You are spot on and I will try to do better.

Yeah, it’s these leather-clad weirdos:

Sorry you have to deal with all of this. Sometimes I wonder why people have kids. And I truly mean that. It doesn’t really make sense to me, beyond the obvious existential meat grinder of having them. I mean obviously many men and women don’t really want the responsibility of them and are unprepared to deal with all…

I can’t help feeling despair when I read things like this. My situation isn’t exactly like yours, but the last paragraph was gut-punchingly familiar. Somehow women are so often on the hook in these domestic task-sharing situations in ways that are so damned if you do, damned if you don’t. We’re told not to nag and…

Wow!! I am gonna email this to my brother, so that he knows what his wife does. even though she too works full time!!

I don’t have kids, but I alw;ays ask my husband this whenever I ask him to take the initiative and take on a household task (because honestly, if I have to take the initiative *for him* I might as well just do it myself). His response is often, “But I don’t know how!”

WELL WHO THE F*** DO YOU THINK TAUGHT ME, YA…

Yep. Utter spunkcrumpets.

I love you. You made me laugh and cry with this.

Many men have posted replies asking why, if I am so busy, I chose to spend ‘hours’ writing this ‘screed.’ They all use a faux measured-and-curious tone but drip with a sense of having ‘zinged’ me. What is hilarious is that you can see by my time stamp that I wrote this at 3:16, or 12:16 my time zone — it took me 15…

The best list! Love the shopping for “sports I don’t understand” I just remembered that my kids played baseball last year in football cleats and a softball helmet!

Yes. And this generation is better than the last. Let that sink in. Fuuuuck. No wonder there was a women’s lib movement. Surprised it didn’t happen sooner.

Holy hell. I wish I could gift you a vacation, or gift your spouse some sense of responsibility!

This is exhausting. I do all this. except the last paragraph because he was useless and we are better off without him. 

I agree. I had a relative who was like this and when I stopped doing household chores this relative saw it as a battle, did even less, played blink to obvious pile-ups, just really acted out her raging sense of entitlement.