I have lived in the UK and the US and I have a sister named Kelley and I am still baffled. Do you mean that they sound a little more like ‘Kellay’ vs ‘Kelleee’?

[deleting comment]

You would have to gouge Noni’s eyes with a cocktail fork to un-doe them, but otherwise point taken.

Whereas if I got unintentionally Snoop-Dog-Level high before appearing at a televised roast, my whole set would be me crying and asking ‘AM I UNHINGED FROM TIME? IS THIS NOW? WHEN IS LATER? STOP LOOKING AT ME!”

Ha, I did the exact opposite! My maiden name is super uncommon, whereas my husband’s (and now mine) is super super common. I love that now I am virtually unsearchable online.

Nope, bar soap is hand soap, and hand soap is for sinks. If you and your folks don’t know how to rinse the bar after you wash your hands, well, you’ve got trouble on your (dirty) hands.

RELATED: Why can’t a person find goddamned bubble bath at the drugstore anymore? It is all bar soap and body wash unless you want something that smells like bubblegum from the kid’s aisle. Bubble bath is awesome and body wash is stupid and bathing has been ruined and you can all go fuck yourselves. SORRY! Sorry. I…

This is what happens when money comes to people who think and talk but don’t read or analyze.

I have been watching with a gimlet eye as this production comes together, because if they screw it up I will be beside myself. That said, Stephen Root is my everything.

I wish Junior LaBeija announced my life

I wish they were better able to capture how straight-up terrifying New York was in general, and Harlem was in particular, in 1987, and how somehow that contributed to this general vibe of ‘Fuck it, the world is on fire so I AM GOING TO MAKE YOU CHOKE ON THIS.’ Everything about the balls felt SO fucking risky. People…

I have a big pumpkin head and very slippery hair so I get what you are saying about all the scarf styles that just slide off your head. My suggestion — truly, give up on all the head wraps and find a cute little pull-on hat, cap, beanie, or toque. I love scarves on other people but I just pull on a hat.

Read this as ‘Pro-Lifers’ and was getting suuuuuuper confused.

His “I am just a confuzed old with a case of teh feeblez” schtick in the court room makes me want to jump out of my chair, get in my time machine, go back to the hearing date, drive to Sacramento, march into the courtroom, and kick the chair out from under him. Wasn’t he doing yard work while simultaneously cooking a…

Really? I say thank god for registries. I want to think as little as possible when it comes to somebody’s baby/wedding gift.

Hail Adrian! Hail Satan! God is dead, Satan Lives! Year One! (Either Kate or her dresser has a wicked sense of humor)

I am so curious about this person! Their online persona is that of a Black woman who loves Hillary, has issues with Bernie, and who thinks everyone who disagrees with her is a Trump supporter. She is wildly reactionary and misreads virtually everything, but usually is speaking up for equity issues and progressive…

I’m snacking what you’re packing. I work in a library and the marketing/buzz was definitely along the lines of “You watched the TMZ clip about the overdose, now read the novel!”

I am picking up on what you are putting down — something about this has been bugging me too. I get the interest — Oswalt is a likeable guy, and McNamara’s book is intriguing, and her own story is tragic, and a lot of people love MFM. And of course Oswalt is super excited that his wife’s dream has been fulfilled…

Newsflash: the shit-ton of makeup obscuring Beyonce’s human flesh face does not help her sing!