The 1980's Toyota Minivan (aka “The Box”) could be opened and started with your classic theft tool, a flat-head screwdriver.

My dad had 2 (manual and auto) and the automatic was so frequently stolen, he gave up, super-epoxied the key in the ignition (to prevent further mangling) and just put in one of those…

This article fails to understand how prosecutions work. You don’t rely on witnesses to provide evidence. You collect evidence to then pressure suspects into admitting that the evidence is correct.

I find missing cookies, and crumbs leading to my child’s room. I then accuse my child of stealing the cookies, and when he…

This Shit Right Here!! Sooooo many other white men of averageness look at me and see another textbook “average” white dude and fucking launch into some racist diatribe on how hard it is for them and how “the blacks” or whoever they’re pissed at have it easy. I feel like I must have a sign on my back that says “I’m…

Not necessarily to eat “healthy” but to know what the various nutritional values are in their food.

As a diabetic, I have more trouble eating at a “mom and pop” restaurant, because they don’t have exact values (or even know the range of a value) for a lot if not all of their food. Fast food by comparison might be…

Huzzah! Its my fault we have fresh water issues, not agricultural/meat businesses, Nestle, or any of the other gigantic corporations that get sweetheart deals to draw on natural resources!

All this time, washing my dishes by hand because I can’t afford to buy a dishwasher, in a cheap apartment because I can’t afford a…

Pedantic commentary: The Amazon Kids tablet deals are not described correctly in the copy. The 7 inch is ~70, the 8 inch is ~90, and the deal at ~150 is for a two pack of 8 inch tablets (it is a fine deal, and is correct in the itemized listing).

Please know that this pedantic comment does not indicate any displeasure…

Pedantic commentary: The Amazon Kids tablet deals are not described correctly in the copy. The 7 inch is ~70, the 8…

I currently live in Honolulu (which has no bearing on my authority, really), and I have also heard this fact.

So two more facts to add to that fact.  Now we have three facts.

I have these fantasies, where a reporter will ask a question and get a clearly-bullshit rubber/glue response, and then follow up on the response with facts(!!), and then let the *president hang on the dead air that follows, and if he comes up with a response, to then FOLLOW UP ON THAT RESPONSE.

I get the frustration…

I leave slightly better than mediocre comments! I can completely understand why you’re lumping me in with the schmucks who navel gaze into oblivion in a public forum.

I’ve gotten out of the Grey’s on one or two of your brother/sister sites through a masterfully devised plan I call “asking, but with self-deprecating…

Isn’t there a rule against selfie posting?

Maybe in the photoshopped photos you circulate, but in person, they are fantastic and just about a perfect mirror of each other.

Perhaps if you were exposed to breasts on a more regular basis, you’d know that many breasts have slight variations. Or if you talked to any woman as an adult and inquired about their…

Since my bachelor party was held at a venue where she was performing, I feel compelled to address this stupid comment by stating that 1) they are firm, 2) they look great on her, and 3) you’re a dipshit.

This is the one true take.

I would love to, but I’m pretty sure I’m still in the grays, and living in Hawaii is objectively better than New York, from a variety of standpoints.

Fact: The first concert I ever attended was a Raffi concert in the Bay Area. I was also ~4 (I could’ve been 3, not sure, my mom picked me up from daycare, we went, I did jumping jacks in the aisle for some reason... it was a different time).

I feel like this makes youthful me retroactively much cooler than current me…

The only thing I need is my Echo Dot. And my Google Home Mini. All I need is my Dot and my Mini. And my Eufy light bulbs. All I need is my Dot, Mini, and my Eufy lights.  And my VeSync plugs. All I need is Alexa, Google, apps, and a sense of self satisfaction that comes from using material things to patch over…

I shall... attempt.

Hurray for small miracles!

I’m outta the greys! I’m somebody!

Thank you kind internet-person.

I own a small collection of “smart home” devices and the like, any chance I can get out of the greys and contribute to the conversation?

Given the Dot is officially $50, but perpetually available at the discounted $35, I have an inkling that the Input will be $35 but perpetually available at $20~$25, which puts it in the “cheap enough” column to be attractive to the slice of people who want voice control but think $35 is just too much.