Enberg’s face and Mel Allen’s catchphrase/glee.

Tell them you’re a fan of Calvin and Hobbes, it’s unimpeachable.

You know what a girl with no hobbies makes her hobby? You. She’s sweet but dull and wants to “be with you” all the time, which will result in weekends spent having brunch and puttering around crappy street fairs and those awful craft towns like New Hope. She doesn’t really have any friends, she just has drinks with…

Sebastian Janikowski has not been one of the better kickers in the league, and has generally just been pretty average from all distances. He’s gotten lots of long kick attempts, but he’s never been notably good on either those or on shorter kicks. Also, and importantly, there is basically zero link between draft…

A girl I was chatting with on Bumble once had “avid reader” or some similar line in her profile and while we were talking I asked her for a book rec.

Her suggestion? Tuesdays with Morrie. Nope, try again.

Drew is wrong. If a girl asks you about your hobbies and says she doesn’t have any of her own, that’s a major red flag. Not the not having hobbies part. Nobody gives a crap about that, and surely she does something to occupy her time as opposed to sitting in a chair blankly for eight hours.

Could have guessed it’s a Christian school just because of the obsession with Muslims and butt rape.

“The freshman told investigators that his teammates restrained him with more duct tape during the drive, pulled down his shorts and underwear, then repeatedly tried to insert an object into his rectum.”

Fun facts about Wheaton College.

This is a classic. Here’s my favorite song from that set:

I never understood how they were classified as a gang. I’ve read some reporting on their big shindig, and there’s certainly a lot of drugs, but not a crazy amount more than any festival. Less than some of the big hipster ones I’d bet. I’d be very curious to see the FBI’s logic, because it seems utterly indefensible on…

[holds it in]

you’re really bending over backwards for some excuses.

TBH, you’d be surprised. In law school, we all had to submit our arrest records for the character and fitness portion of the bar exam, and there was a lot of people (who are now very skilled attorneys) bitching about going back to their college towns to pick up a record for a PI they picked up back in undergrad.

That doesn’t mean it was OK for him to be drunk in public in front of cops.

If you told me five years ago there is a group of Americans that make the Juggalos look sane and reasonable...

We’re told Timmons had spoken with his baby mama who lives there and had told her he missed the baby and wanted to visit.

I don’t see what the big deal is — Timmons was just one of millions of people in SoCal yesterday who managed to avoid going to the Dolphins-Chargers game.

Yet more evidence of ESPN’s liberal, left-wang coverage.

It’s a good thing that the technology to determine balls and strikes during a game does not exist!