We can’t afford to be perceived as enemies of law and order.

Given that they’re out there committing literal war crimes...

7th grade, 1985/86. For Christmas I received a gift certificate for a perm, yay!!! For a reason I will never understand, I decided to cut my bangs before going to the salon. I kept cutting and cutting and cutting until I was left with, for lack of a better description, a bangs crew cut. I went thru with the perm. I…

Determined not to have boring straight hair, and tired of fighting the absolutely unbelievable year-round humidity of the gulf south which no combination of hot rollers and hairspray can cope with, in the mid 90s I decided to return to my high school days and do a perm. Pfft, I color my own hair all the time, how hard…

I live about two blocks from that Target (which is... just a Target), and while everyone’s focusing on the Target and Aldi, nobody’s talking about all the Somali and Latinx businesses that also got destroyed, or the low income medical clinic, the subsidized housing, etc.

Yeah, about that “random Target”:

If you pull on her kerchief her head rolls off.

The tone of dirtbag shifts so much. Lauren and Garrett’s are fun, cheeky, and poke at celebs. Joan just comes across as bitter and angry. To each their own, but their less fun to read. 

Breathe!

Is Trump living in a sealed chamber in the WH? I’ve heard he’s a notorious germaphobe but it’s hard to believe he’s been able to dodge the virus this long.

Perfect way to open the Attic!

After a life of working in restaurants, these are the worst memories that I haven’t repressed:

My sister-in-law works for a very popular hipster restaurant in the trendy nightlife area of our Great Plains town. It’s a basement restaurant in a warehouse. My husband used to work in the kitchen and loved to tell me stories about the possums living in the catacombed corners of the storage areas down there scaring…

I miss Behind closed ovens...

I worked in hospitality for years. At one hip, swanky celebrity hotspot, one woman, apparently a former Playmate, stumbled past a table on her way to the restroom, scooped up a cocktail from another diner’s (ie. total stranger’s) table and downed it like a shot. She then returned to her stool at the bar where she…

Unsettling... I was a kid and my family would go for lunch on Sundays. We were at a steakhouse (Ponderosa, I think), and an adult couple a few tables over were having an argument. She got up, started to walk away while he was still beaking at her. A couple of steps later, she stopped and stood perfectly still. Dad…

My neighbor behind our house owns the empty lot next to our house, which until last year had 32 trees on a 50x100 lot (basically a rare forest in a residential area). She had all 32 trees cut down because she doesn’t like leaves. There are two remaining trees: a pine that she cut the top off with a machete and a rose…

My worst neighbors...don’t actually live there. I live in a mid-size but relatively expensive city, in a cute, fairly quiet, centrally located neighborhood. The house next to mine has been empty for 20+ years due to an inheritance dispute - I’m talking empty to the point of broken windows with cardboard taped up,…

It looks like you didn’t really do this part: “split the ears lengthwise of the ear, and with the back of a knife scrape off the corn, leaving the hulls on the cob”.

At work, and in my life, I spend a lot of time talking about Lucretia Mott (abolitionist, women’s rights reformer, all around amazing Quaker) and I’m also kind of obsessed with her food tendencies. She carried snacks around in her cloak. She loved to cook and was proud of it. So much that when a newspaper misprinted…