Maybe she meant the vodka.

I mean, she works in the fashion industry. Are you surprised?

The real question, is why do rappers hold guitars like fucking numpties?

More likely to run into porn stars?

Oh fuck you forever.

Perhaps related to Giselle, rubber balls, and liquor?

Found the Mets fan.

I don’t know if it’s that close, I’d have to check the polling numbers. I’d have to presume it is though. Keeping in mind, this is a heavily military area, particularly Navy. So having two vets head-to-head could be a pretty tight race.

The other opponent is an erstwhile Democrat. Two Democrats on the ballot, even if one is running as an Independent, would split the “liberal” vote.

Ah yes, the “overzealous campaign aide.” That nameless, faceless wunderkind who is able to do all the things that the candidate would “just love to do, but I can’t because of all these pesky campaign regulations, wouldn’t it be nice if someone would just take care of it...” without repercussion. 

I know you meant “vicious,” but the imagery of “viscous” is so beautiful.

Well, then consider the Libs owned. See you later!

Ditto for “Alt-Right.” Fuck that gaslighting bullshit. This isn’t conservative, this isn’t right, and it sure as hell isn’t an alternative to those who legitimately do sit right of center. If you have to come up with a cognomen for your shitty ideology, then you’re just a straight-up Nazi.

It’s just that calling it “Cougar” sounded too desperate, so here we are.

Please tell me that vegan sausage is made from actual vegans?

This is true. Probably because they’re bottom feeders and tend to pick up bad flavors from bad water, whereas a reputable farm keeps fresher water circulating through the tanks.

Rich AND horse people? Oof. That’s just the worst.

Not enough merde.

To be clear, there’s only one way to eat catfish anyway. Nuggetized or filleted, battered with salt and peper, then deep fried. It’s not a fancy fish and doesn’t need a fancy prep. Down home style and you’re all set. Serve it with steak fries and tartar sauce and all is right with the world.

It’s just a ...vein... right? Right?