I’m in a committed relationship with a woman I adore and respect in equal measure, and who I’m reasonably certain feels the same way about me (most of the time, anyway), yet it’s all I can do to get laid on an occasional basis. But half of you gals would get it on with this thing. Yeah. I’m done. Sidebar out.

Ol’ Blue Eye

So would you say this beef has been cooked to medium rare plus?

Fox Landed WWE By Promising Them Everything They Ever Wanted

I have as much guilt as the next guy about the times when I come up short as a dad: you lose your temper over some bullshit a little too easily, you get stuck late at work and miss a big game, you prioritize a night out with the wife over a night home with the boys, etc. But there is nothing - and I mean this…

I like the way Snrub thinks.

“If she does her job, then I wouldn’t have to do that.”

If everything is quantifiable, then I am sure there is some statistic for the quality of the looks that each team had from beyond the arc. QoL{+/-} or some shit like that, which would correlate to floor spacing and have predictive validity in terms of the likelihood of a shot finding the hoop. Which is all to say:…

I’m not driving him to the airport!

This is a very fair point. Some of these dipshits won’t even pay lipservice to doing the right thing. A star for you.

I think this is probably right. But since the policy was not approved (or even discussed!) with the NFLPA, query whether it would be permissible for any team to pass along such a fine to a player. (If it is, that’s one hell of a loophole through the collective bargaining agreement).

If I understand the new policy correctly, the teams are responsible for any fines that result from noncompliance, so isn’t Chris Johnson’s offer a little cynical?

Perhaps you’d prefer “‘Tics in Six!”? (Very few of us are ready to let this go just yet, but it won’t be more than another couple of days now.)

Correctly spelled and everything. I applaud the legwork.

Meh: after the last Christian hack the Jets put under center, it’s hard to blame them for being hesitant with this one.

More ? Jesus, guys. Today is like when FJM used to take over except instead of FJM it’s my seven year-old and his friends. Piss and shit stories really kill with that crowd

Serious question: is this the first time in Deadspin history with back-to-back blogs about dudes peeing on themselves? I want to say no . . .

Haag’s final Frontier: to boldly go where no man has gone before.

“[T]hings are going horrifically wrong in Baltimore.”

Yeah, but it’s pronounced “badass.”