This is going to be criminally under-appreciated, but I am dying.

Don’t forget “bitter looser.” Owned much, Lauren?

Setting the right tone is key. But, when people do complain, I always give them the same response: “I totally hear you. When you coach the team next year, you should absolutely do it that way.” That usually about covers it.

Thanks, man. I absolutely love coaching these kids. And we’ve got a decent group of guys at the helm in our town so we’ve been able to keep the nutjobs at bay (for the most part).

The best laid plans, brother. My six year-old routinely kicks my ass at Madden ‘18. There are just So Many Fucking Buttons. Why are there more buttons than fingers? That is too many buttons!

You guys could do an entire site devoted to stories of parents and coaches who have gone clinically insane over youth sports. My boys are 8 and 6 and so I am just now hitting the youth sports stride . . . . and oh my lord the crazy. My parents swear it wasn’t like this when we were kids (I am 39).

Should’ve called in Burneko.

+1/4

That sounds terrible and I cannot imagine I would handle so many challenges at once. If the well wishes of a stranger on the Internet can help at all, you’ve got them.

Is this where I put the obligatory “mend it don’t end it” comment? Replay has been great for correcting obvious blown calls. But of course you’re right that the painstaking review of minutiae - in baseball and football especially - is soul-crushing.

But why?

That’s the Super Macho Man delivery from Punch-Out.

Who’s the Voss?

“Some pitcher somewhere.”

“Mike Francesa is the worst possible WFAN afternoon drive option, except for all the others.”

This is amazing. And it only cost the firm about three hours of my time today.

Why aren’t we discussing the fact that this shouldn’t be a balk at all? He clearly just dropped the ball. How does that deceive the runner? How does awarding another base in that situation further the presumed goal of the balk rules, i.e., striking a balance between the pitcher’s effort to keep the runner from…

A 20-something taking to Instagram to complain that his employer isn’t treating him like an adult is perhaps the most 2018 thing ever.

Nicely done.