This one, because I’m 12 years old.

Does this apply to human children as well? Asking for a fiend.

John Elway is a horse-toothed idiot

We find common ground on Brooklyn Nine-Nine and Arrested Development.

Why, what’s the final sco—whoa.

Yes they are, my friend. Yes they are.

I love this show, and the way it maintains continuity and callbacks while still striking out onto new paths.

“You’re the boss, apple sauce” is a phrase I can’t stop saying. (Damn you, Wes Warhammer!)

I do love that on NewsRadio Jimmy and Bill did the classic “Morning Ralph/ Morning Sam” exchange as they stepped through the broken window of Dave’s office.

Call him “Seedling,” because he just got planted.

Won’t that fuck up your gizzard?

There’s probably a reason for that.

Sold!

Nick Pivetta? I barely remember him now.

1998 — Doug Glanville! Scott Rolen! Curt Schilling! Ricky Bottalico! Terry Francona, before he learned how to manage a baseball team! Ruben Fucking Amaro, Jr.!

I was kind of hoping that, with Victorino and Utley retiring, we might get another hero from 2008 to come back to Philly.

I saw that in the theater 22 years ago. Yikes! Maybe the movie isn’t getting old, but I sure as hell am.

Oh my God, the braces. I forgot about the braces.

Well, that group plus Metallica fans.

My own first Parker Posey sighting was her role as the Dairy Queen worker -turned-actress in Waiting For Guffman. Ten years later, I did a double-take when I found out she would be co-starring as Kevin Spacey’s girlfriend in Superman Returns.