I have always loved the opening to “Apocalypse Now.” It sets the nihilistic tone of the film immediately.

Philly sports is one giant garbage fire.

Yes, and no.

Oy. Kill me now.

As an Eagles fan, I feel confident in predicting this hire will not end well. Of course they never do, but this one may end sooner rather than later.

That’s just good ol’ Kyle, rubbing his Villanova education in his buddy’s face. We’re obnoxious that way!

Wendy Liebman is very good at those “twist” punchlines as well.

Funny (as it were) that you mentioned paraprosdokian comedy. One of my favorite all-time comedians, Emo Phillips, is a goddamned master of it.

Perhaps it is, but so is this one: “Duck Amuck” is the greatest piece of animation ever produced.

And here’s where I have to give props to J.J. Abrams’ first Trek movie for using real-life images of Saturn from the Cassini Space Probe for its most arrestingly beautiful images.

“This is going to be such a glorious shitshow.” —Me, Summer 2015

Good idea. I think I need to lie down for a while.

Immortality: MAKE IT SO.

I guess that’s better than Death going after sixty nine-year-olds. That’s a completely different level of tragedy.

That’s good make-up.

More like “Poe Dancearon,” am I right?

“Where the hell’s this ‘Drew’ punk?”

Chip Kelly, huh?

And Patrick Stewart!

+1, you magnificent bastard.