Took me way too long. Nicely done.

One time a customer pooped all over the escalator at my old job and we had to evacuate the premises.

Brett finally gets the response he wants from a sent message. People view it and say, “What a dick!”

Fuck Urban Meyer in the fucking neck.

There is absolutely a zero percent chance that was the ONLY “challenge” they’re referring to him suffering this season.

It feels like that was probably the end of Alex Smith’s career, which is really sad. I realize that he doesn’t get that much respect here, but the dude has done a lot and I was hoping that he would be able to at least quit on his own terms after this season or the next.

Overtraining, steroids, etc.? Modern day athletes seem like those high end sports cars that operate at the peak of performance but something little can cause them to go completely haywire.

Meanwhile, his agent’s business card remains untouched.

Acting Attorney General Bull Shannon 

I support Matt Whitaker for Acting US Attorney General.

Thanks, sweetie.  Take a hard candy from the dish.

Good one, Nana!

How’s Torts going this semester?

Budding 14-Year-Old Reactionary Currently Wearing A Big Dogs Shirt While Sitting In ISS: Whatever, man. Michael Jordan used to deal with this kind of defense every single possession.

I’m rarely a fan of escalating on-court shenanigans into actual courts, but that’s assault.

Yup. It’s a rare situation where he was absolutely right but also really screwed up. 

As much as I think Bell was right to just do whatever he thinks is best for him and fuck all the haters, he is going to end up leaving a ton of money on the table. The soft collusion that pervades the ownership ranks of the NFL is going to lead to him getting a much smaller contract offer than if he had played this…

That hit by Lucic was so nasty that the NHL added six games to Tom Wilson’s suspension just on general principles.

So what are the texts to which he refers?

Has he ever said “kimchi,” “Post Malone,” or “Deal Or No Deal”? Because I could get behind this.