We wanted to know what it would look like if they'd been racing each other

Obviously not him since that man appears to be guarding her.

I hope you're proud of yourself for watching that whole thing just to see a combined 1.5 seconds of nipple.

This shouldn't have come as a shock to the old fool. It was pretty obvious years ago when young Michael made it clear that his favorite part of baseball season was the Pitchers and Catchers reporting for Duty.

What would be more Cleveland than Weeden getting sent to the Dolphins then having a five minute long feature on Fox Sports 1 where he announces that he'll be taking his Luggage to South Beach?

If I'm Denver, I'm taking this kid with my first pick with the hopes that he can finally silence Peyton's duck farts.

Only four of them worked? That's gay.

fantastic

The Greeks look in on the Sochi Olympics nervously, as fears of their modern Olympics record for 'Most Analingus Performed during the games' continue to rise, and their record, once thought to be untouchable, sits in peril.

Wow. +1

How 3rd world of them! See, in America when a furry old dog that nobody wants anymore wanders onto the field of a major sporting events opening ceremony, they let him do the coin toss.

When the situation you're in is quite scary,

This is a professional sport, played by grown men. If you don't want to be down by 40, or give up 62, try playing defense. Fuck the code, if they didn't want to be a part of history, it was up to them to stop it.

You think this is a good Brett Hull story? Lets not even get into his legendary foot worship. Crazy guy almost always had his foot in some broads crease.

Wait until they find out that he used to be a woman...

I am honored to be a part of this list. This despicable, perfect list.

In Soviet Russia, child molests you.

Some guys will do anything to force a trade to the perennial contender Bengals

Kellen Winslow never misses Target practice.