What is this "Life" you speak of that supposedly exists in Cleveland?

Also, do announcers factor into the calculation of what's watchable? Because anyone having to hear Joe Buck or Spero Dedas do play-by-play or Dan Fouts do commentary is also screwed.

Red Zone means never getting screwed

Google "Fernanda Lima"

(removing double post)

A lot of our key players play in Europe though: Clint Dempsey, Michael Bradley, Jozy Altidore, Fabien Johnson, etc.

Dempsey: Germans?
Donovan: Forget it, he's rolling

"At ESPN, panic set right away. SportsCenter producer Glenn Jacobs sent an email just after 6 a.m. to fellow programming people."

Glenn Jacobs reportedly had this reaction:

Why did we waste the "Air Canada" moniker on Vince Carter when he isn't even Canadian?

Get him to say "Sbu" so we can get some free lunch specials!

And Pete Prisco survived the cuts? Inconcievable!

Is MJ in financial trouble? Why would you sell a place like this?

Only in Obama's town...

Rick Perry is an A&M graduate, by the way.

In a word: Liverpool

Think how much better Hoops Mania would have been with an actual recording artist performing.

According to Ted Cruz, all these soccer players are now running Obamacare :P

Did you just.... grammar nazi yourself?

That's more of a quote from Paul Tagliabue.

Well, if that's what it takes to prevent this kind of shit, then maybe 90% of the plays need to be flagged. Players have always adjusted and those that can't adjust will be working at McDonalds.