I have a lousy food processor - it handles chickpeas just find, but balks at sesame seeds.

Reminds of that old Robert Fulghum saying - something about what a good day it would be if schools had all the cash they needed, but the military need to hold a bake sale to buy a bomber.

You'd probably be better off with a lamb. The cool thing about goats is that they will eat stuff on lawns that sheep won't touch, like poison ivy and kudzu. But they eat damn near anything - nails, glasses (both bar and eye), lawn toys, plastic bags, hand tools.

I have fond memories of Easter goat prep from my childhood in Houston. In the barrio where I lived, goats and calves would show in backyards at the beginning of Lent, only to "disappear" at the beginning of Passion week.

Yeah, it should be a choice.

Except for women, where it should be small enough to fit between their thighs.

I propose that they simply form a "Congregation of Eros," which should take care of that pesky 1st amendment problem.

I agree. It's not cool for affinity groups to hold large gatherings, especially when they ask for donations to cover their expenses.

I was thinking more along the lines of:

Remember, the guy who called in the false complaint remained on the phone with 911, and even called back several times and threatened dispatch. Phone calls can be easily traced.

Yep, I'd cast my vote for the parents as well.

Sure you've got nothing to hide.

Actually, there doesn't even have to be proof to arrest someone, only probable cause.

The operative from Team Cat who was assigned to me in my teenage years was quite the authoritarian. Guinevere was a queen, large and in charge, and never let her humans forget it. However, the wanton destruction of curtains, furniture, clothing, shoes, and the shredding of textbooks and homework did not endear the…

Sadly, it's all to easy for anyone -including me - to treat a young woman this way.

Great! I've found your new client-

So does Lars teach? Do seminars?

My Mom taught me the cure for men who like to shock by engaging in "public exposure"

Actually this is one of the reasons peeing outside is illegal, even in cases where there are no toilets -it's a way to arrest and harass people who are too poor to access "public" toilets. People have even been arrested for urinating on trees in National Parks near hiking trails.

Oh, now come on. I thought that image of Snark trying to punch thru a dashboard and smacking his own head was pretty funny -