Well, hopefully he can find another minor to have sex with.

Half marathons are foolish too. Here's a real challenge: Think for yourself and tell all your yuppy friends that you're not participating. Explain to them, as they look on in bewilderment, that they're also NOT gluten-intolerant, and their favorite banjo themed indie-band has, and always will, suck.

Let's be honest: People do it for the douchy bumper sticker.

nice

They should sell these shirts alonside Harley-Davidson apparel and save their customers the extra trip.

He plays like a maniac. Only a matter of time before he blows his knee out again, and then takes twice the average time to recover. Oh, and the bulls aren't going anywhere, so it's all for naught.

I considered replacing my bourbon with scotch, but the sideboard was too far.

Celebrities should be tweeting post-abortion selfies, sponsored by Planned Parenthood. We need to get over the taboo of talking about a procedure almost every woman undergoes once in the their life. And we certainly need to stop promoting pregnancy in general; Far too many are unplanned.

This is almost as sad as Cory Montieth's death. Now that's a real tragedy. :-(

Life isn't fair. Learn how to lock your bike up properly. Or am I blaming the victim?

Actually looking back, I misread her comment. So my entire premise was flawed. But I sincerely meant it as a friendly advice, that you should be happy with who you are and seek those who feel the same about you. Honestly meant no offense. I know it's pithy and cliche. Bit you can't really argue it's an insult.

Fine. I just don't want her taking that body she's so insecure about, and hurling it into oncoming freeway traffic.

Thanks, KIM!

crafty bastards. smith was on to something

well that's just silly

So, polygamy is really the answer here, right? Mormons win again.

He's actually a Cards fan, so his behavior is more acceptable.

It's a warning to others that the speaker is vacuous and unsophisticated. Attempting to discuss anything meaningful would result in futility and white-hot frustration.

What's more offensive than an opinionated neighborhood crank?? Negligent parents!
Apathetic about your child's long term health? Then expect to be occasionally embarrassed by a member of your community.
Sorry, but too many parents want to be friends with their kids. You say you love your child? Then show it. Raise them…

If all hairdressers in the country walked out on strike, maybe then conservative voting women would get the picture and stop voting the way their fathers and husbands demand they do. How the fuck this transparent discrimination can still be tolerated in 2013 is fucking unreal.