I thought this round thing was a pizza cutter attachment.

I thought this round thing was a pizza cutter attachment.

Fancy Kristen uses a Ferrari to light other cars on fire.

Headline: Man drives poorly, ruins future.

I’m actually more confident in an autonomous car’s ability to back up safely in this situation than I would be of a human driver’s ability to do the same. An autonomous vehicle, if designed properly, is fully aware of its surroundings at all times. When it backs up it knows exactly what space it has and what’s around…

All of Texas did my exes

Wow another Harvey Weinstein production revealed.

Ohhh yea, pointy shoes, that explains the boney hip and ribs. Someone buy the poor thing a fucking burger! Do the pay her? Can she afford groceries? Can I take her grocery shopping…?

who the fuck is John Tesh

Best unintentional social commentary EVAR

Hmmmm... definitely suspicious.

This makes me irrationally angry.

Well, more of a rounded triangle ...

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

I never met a person in a Hawaiian shirt that was pleasant.

That’s why I wear mine under a jacket.

The action of going mudding makes you a redneck. It’s just reality.

You can be a wealthy hedge fund manager from Wall Street named Kip Smithers, but for those five minutes that you’re ripping donuts through a field in your Mercedes GLS, you’re a redneck.

When civil society breaks down, we’re gonna need people bringing us the good deals more than ever, Shep

When civil society breaks down, we’re gonna need people bringing us the good deals more than ever, Shep

I’m going to go through every response, look for someone mentioning that “he deserved it because Lycra,” and then go and find my own 31-ounce Louisville Slugger

No capes!

i mean i would too but that’s besides the point