Wow. I've never thought I would ever like anything Joan Rivers said ever. But good job ma'am. Good job.

Exactly. Fire him or her. Seriously.

This picture right here? Sucker punch to the ovaries.

I love you.

I love green monsters. They're my breakfast drink. But then you know, I'll follow it up with real food later. Like a donut.

SHE APOLOGIZED TO HIM?

please be performance art project, please be performance art project, please be performance art project.

I have watched Archer in an attempt to fill the void. I hope I can be as good of a mother as her one day.

I have missed her so so much.

You mean that breastfeeding your child for five years isn't the best thing to do?

This.is.amazing.

That is a perfectly reasonable idea. But we live in an over share culture now so that would require people to not post things like "OMG MY WATER JUST BROKE" on facebook.

Good for you.

I completely get it. My stepmom is more of a mother to me than my own biological mother. But I constantly find myself having to defend my stepmom doing stuff with me to other people. "She's not your real mom so why don't I step in?"

My sister-in-law had seven fucking people in the delivery room. Most of them were not family.

You have my permission to slap her.

Um no.

Did not die at 25

After this horror story round, can we please do a Resident Assistant horror story round? Holy shit, so much fucked up with that system. The stories! The stories!

Up All Night was great until they ruined it.