My dudes, you have killed Splinter, you laid off a bunch of cool journalists, I have even stuck with you through your auto-play video ads that kill my YouTube video playing in the background, but if you don’t stop these ads that auto-forward my ipad to some “install flash player now!” website with no back button so I…

genuinely unsure how anyone with any reading  comprehension could come to this conclusion

Yeah, this has a distinctly non-consensual feel to it. She is literally there as a requirement of her job. Kudos to her (i guess?) for being a good sport about it but it feels real yucky to watch the video of enormous men wearing face covering goggles drenching a single, totally unprotected woman with alcohol.

It’s absolutely degrading behavior. Teenager mob mentality.

“... just two of 17 girlfriends Gayle had at the time of the murder.”

I imagine it’s like “what is an australia” while on the phone with Scott Morrison.

Haven’t too many holes already been poked in the Sandusky saga?

Breakaway bases are recommended by doctors because idiot kids are not taught how to slide properly. They are not recommended for professional baseball (as your link only indicates recommendation for recreational baseball). I’m guessing the American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons would recommend against standing 60…

Ingram assaulting them anally and vaginally with his penis

Try something for me, Dave. Google “who is GM of the Patriots.” With or without the quotes. Your choice.

“You can just throw them out of windows??”

I’m trying to make an analogy to the time a classmate in high school stole the biology teacher’s calculator and got caught and suspended when he attempted to sell it back to him, but I’m not finding the angle.

You sweet summer child. 

Once again, a soccer story that ends with no scoring.

Vázquez then told police that he and the victim had “sex but not really.”

Get back to work, Nibbles!

Needs “Getting Hit by a Jet” somewhere in there, per Deadspin’s styling guidelines.

2019 Jets Nightmares, ranked

10. Getting hit by a bus