If there’s anything I learned from Westworld, it’s that the robots always remember...

Can everyone hear that? That’s the sounds of Disney/Pixar executives rubbing their hands together from all the free publicity this teaser has created.

I’m just dying to get my cigarettes back.

+1 door

Dammit Paul!

7th grade, a friend of mine lets me borrow his Honda NC50 moped for a short drive down the street. I instantly forget where the brake lever is and crash it into a giant shrub.

Thank you! This chart was rendered irrelevant once I looked closer at the typeface selection.

Not as sorry as Brad Lidge’s performance in the series.

Guess which Astros fan forked over a cool G for Game Four nosebleed tix. This jackwagon.

That dude better be riding along with the team on their victory parade.

Don’t downforce the issue here. Aero be lots of puns.

No? Well it just got 10ft higher!

Guess I can cancel my plans to see the 24 Hours of LeMans in 2018.

What are the odds that one (or more than one) of these guys is named Gord?

Today’s useless fact: the guy in the middle at 3:32 is wearing a 93Q tshirt. It was (at the time) Houston’s most popular top 40 station in the mid-late 80s.

I would bend the nozzle of the washer headlights to spray pedestrians as I roll by.

“How Rude!”

Look, the Big 12 is fine with 10 members. We have enough schools. No need to be alarmed. Everything is fine. 

True, but as a Latin gentleman in his 40s, I draw the line at women half my age. It just comes across creepy AF.

As a citizen of the ‘meh’ state of Texas, Clayton Williams actually said this in the weeks running up to the race for Governor in 1990.