there will be no alcohol sold

That is fantastic. Whoever did that, please see commenter services to collect your bushel of +1's.

Don't laugh at Ray-Ray. You can hide a shitload of knives under a Snuggie that big.

@AzureTexan: Wait a second... how many moonpies?

I tend to forget this sometimes because of the team name, but the Texas Rangers play in the Dallas area, making this, quite literally, as good as it gets.

@pj134: I was thinking the same thing. I'm in Pittsburgh now but I'd take as much time off as I needed to make it to Game 2.

@Tully Blanchard Enterprises: JJ Dillon and Charlie Manuel - separated at birth?

Just for fun I tuned in for the 2 minutes of WFAN I could stomach, and Craig Carton and Boomer Esiason bravely put Cliff Lee in the category of Lebron James, "guys who didn't want to come to New York, who couldn't handle it here."

@Desi_Relaford: Stupifying. Just... dude. Doc and Cliff. Cliff and Doc.

For some reason, it's even better that the Phils were the "Mystery Team."

@OchentaYcinco: Also, HOLY FUCKING SHIT, WELCOME BACK PHIFER!

Just woke up on the couch to Sportscenter beginning and groggily rewound the DVR. Now on the way to the ER for the jaw I shattered off the ground.

I think I'm with Simmons. It's not as if he's responding to just some random guy who took a shot at him. These guys were obviously at least acquaintences, and Pierce publicly shit all over something he put a lot of work into.

The egg nog then returned the Reese's cup for a touchdown.

he's a diva even Favre would disdain.

@DavidWrightstuff: I'm sure they'll add a couple white guys to keep the world on its axis.

And take a bath, Pigpen, you filthy fucking dick.

and then you realize Verducci is being as much of a blog-baiting fathead as the guy he's lampooning

Find Eric Moulds doing something productive. Price should be across from him, doing next to nothing.

That's some quality snark, Verducci. Nicely done.