If you shout ANONYMOUS three times into the Internet, can they hear you?

Things that make us sluts:

Do you think they're mad because the girls uttered "dirty" words, or because they let the cat out of the bag about the mechanics of sex?

And in the morning too! It gently whispers "Wake up Mr. West, Mr. Fresh, Mr. By Hisself He's So Impressed"

I enjoy that he uses actual grammar and punctuation and stuff while tweeting.

Dad may not realize it, and it's probably not why he did it — but moments like these will buttress what is already a wonderful dad/daughter relationship. I wish my dad had been anything like that.

Jesus loved it when people called women sluts. He was all "throw stones at those sluts!" I think that's how the story goes.

I really feel like tweeting massive support at him so he knows that not everyone is an idiot.

"I do not understand why you are calling my daughter a whore." BOOM! No sassy comeback. No name-calling. Just simple, plain old shining a light on jerkdom. That, folks, is how it's DONE.

And yet conservatives can't understand why they don't appeal to a younger demographic, or women, or people of color, or...

Aren't encouraging, pro-woman dads the bestest? Like that one time my apa drove me to a hair appointment when I was 10 and he totes snarked on this one lady who was all pearl-clutchy about her own daughter getting a short haircut. Because "Ay dios mio, what will your father think!" "He shouldn't think anything, pendeja…

Ah, the good old moral "family values" anti-choicers, who just want to respect and protect women so much that they call any teenage girl who dares to contradict them a whore.

I have kind of a crush on Billy Joe right now, not gonna lie.

Hey man, they've got class!

Bible class.

This is one calm-ass dude. Looking at his twitter feed, he would be totally justified in just losing his shit on these assholes. But he's cool as a cucumber.

I have several awesome dad moments, he taught at my high school and the principal hated him and subsequently hated me. My favorite though is when I got caught smoking behind the tennis court. The vice principal pulled my dad out of class to tell him, his response, "why the hell are you at my door, do you go to other…

Shouldn't this kind of practical advice really be featured on Lifehacker?

Are you and your friends a gay fish?

HOLD UP. Tell me more about this Cat College.

Gwyneth Paltrow closed her laptop and took a sip of her polar ice cap water, ethically sourced and double-filtered through activated charcoal. "Well played, Mr. West. Well played."