There is never a bad time to post this video...

This kind of echoes the experience of anyone trying keto/paleo/whatever else that's high fat low carb. I don't really follow any specific eating label, but I did go from diet everything to just normal food over the past couple years. The result from adding fat into my diet has been way less snacking, being less…

Pfft. I have to go around all year putting on a fake smile in our fucking ALWAYS BE HAPPY AND SMILE nightmare society. Let me have one day where people can at least understand why I'm such a bitter asshole.

This is going to be uncomfortable when this song comes on in a bar and drunk white girls sing it.

Bitches love hooks. That's why stags have antlers.

I cannot do Goldschläger, it's like those cinnamon jelly beans.

Good heavens, why are you shouting the words "vaginal atrophy?" I understand that this sounds horrific to someone who is, perhaps, many years away from menopause, but all it means is that the tissues in the vaginal canal become dry and more fragile...it's not quite as if the whole thing shrinks up and goes away. How…

Gorgeous Lawyer: "My best friend and some of the guys [from their college-era band] are coming into town next weekend, so I'll be hosting and taking them around."
Me: "Ooh, I can go home to see my parents that weekend, then. They've been asking."
GL: "I mean, you're welcome to come out with us. They want to meet you,…

This is horrible news for me because people often remember me...

Oh dear.

I would want to see Mark Wahlberg. Want to see if his skills in The Boxer matches his skills IRL.

My cousin and best friend, both of whom are personal trainers, have told me that if you are not in shape, you should work your way up to, not train to the point of getting sick and passing out. If you have trainers telling you that this is a healthy thing, you need to get new trainers.

I watched one episode of this show several years ago, saw a person working out so hard they threw up and nearly passed out, decided this bull hockey was dangerous and worth no one's time, and changed the channel. We can all change the channel.

$465?! I was reading this article expecting the amount to be much much more. I don't know how much the debt was at that school in Utah but if it was even close to this amount that makes it even more ridiculous that the school would be throwing away the kids' food over a few hundred dollars. I was seriously expecting…

I met my now-husband (NH) while out at a dive bar with my then-serious boyfriend (BF). NH had wanted to hit on me, apparently, but then saw the BF and ditched that idea. But we were all hanging out at the same space in the bar, and eventually started shooting the shit. NH became a friend of BF and me, and we would…

I used to tackle this problem with what I believed a novel and exceedingly clever tactic; I would simply mimic his own snore back to him, which would immediately stop him without waking him up. But then one night he opened his eyes and said "you really have to do something about your snoring". RAGE.