I think #1 is a wive’s tale. However, I’ve only had one kid (fellow commenter HippieChick), who turned 25 yesterday. She was born with a full head of hair—not THAT full—but no heartburn for me. Also, her hair never fell out. It just kept growing, and sticking out from her head in every direction. Because she grew hair…

All librarians should read Connie Willis’s Bellweather. Her heroine studies trends for a living and makes a point of going to the library every week to check out old classics so they don’t get pulled for more copies of Bridges of Madison County or Angels in the Boardroom.

Do it. Librarians are heroes. I can go to them practically in tears because I’ve lost it either trying to figure out how to cite a source, or locate obscure source material. They come to my rescue without breaking a sweat. I fucking love librarians.

Please don’t be discouraged by that, it’s just part of the job, the war stories you tell around the lunch table. There’s a lot of reward in there too.

That particular book being sticky is particularly off-putting.

All of this is why if I ever marry, I am going to take my wife’s name. It started as a way to piss off my parents, but has morphed in a genuinely held belief. That it continues to piss off my parents is now a cherry on top.

I’ve seen and really don’t get this argument. My last name has been my last name from birth. Just like it was my father’s last name from birth. Is it more “his” last name than mine because he’s a man? Or because he’s older? It’s not “my father’s name”—it’s a whole bunch of “Keyser’s” (men and women) names. Including…

It is a show! Come Dine with Me is a program in the UK where four strangers take turns having a dinner party for all the other contestants. The contestants rate each other and share snarky comments about the other hosts. At the last dinner party each week, the host rated highest gets £1000. I’m pretty sure you can…

I'm lucky in that my family reunions could very well be a reality show. There's drinking! Tears! Blood (twice last year)! Drama! Secret babies! Drinking! That time the boat ran out of gas in the middle of the lake!

INT: Courtroom
VOICEOVER: She did it as a governor. She did it on the campaign trail. Now she does it as a judge. She’s Sarah Palin, and it’s time once again for her to...

I don’t know what to do. This is why I never vote for county coroner. What if I elect a necrophiliac? better just to leave it blank. I can’t live with that on my soul.

The first GIF is Michael Jordan.

not even in his be like mike heyday?

My favorite part of this is that a guy is being sent to jail essentially for complaining to the media about how hard it is to be a rapist who got off easy. I mean, if he hadn’t whined to the reporter, no story. No story and judge doesn’t know that he is violating probation. I mean, it’s the Shakespearian Sonnet of…

I prefer the one describing him as an escaped state fair corndog who stole a wig from a trashcan...

Don’t fuck this up. I’m looking at you, people who think caffeine is better than weed.

How is Rabbies Formed?

Scott Disick taking a girl to Joe Francis’ house is more rape-y than a windowless white van with Stone Temple Pilots’ “Sex Type Thing” blasting on the stereo, driven by a guy wearing a ski mask.

Said it before and will say again: literally don't care who is on the Dem ticket. I was and am a Bernie supporter but I would vote for Voldemort at this point over any of the fuckwits on the other side.